Amazing Race
Amazing “Crazy” Race

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B | 64 USERS: A-

Finally Nicole & Travis make it to the mat, Nicole nearly overcome with emotion. And none of it good. The other two teams are still there, and there are hugs all around before Nicole turns to the robot greeter and says, "I don't like you." I understand she had a frustrating experience, but that's just racist. Still, they're happy to be team number three, and Phil expansively tells all of them, "Your plan to be the final three teams…" Ooh, I can't wait to see how this sentence ends. "…crumbled to dust like a vampire the moment it was exposed to Japanese daylight!" Or, "Makes a mockery of the very concept of plans!" Or simply, "Gang aft agley!" But I'm very disappointed when that sentence ends with a simple, "has worked!" And he doesn't even add, "Despite all your best efforts to the contrary!" They're the teams who will be racing to the finish line, and the robot beeps and hugs Jason & Amy without seeming to break their ribs.

After the winners' party at the mat, the place looks pretty lonely when the Afghanimals arrive for their long-overdue Philimination. "Didn't work out the way you wanted it to work out," he comments. Leo says they're disappointed and sad, but it was one of the best experiences of his life and he wouldn't trade it for anything and he did it with his best friend and they learned a lot about themselves and each other. I think that covers all the clichés, doesn't it? "The Afghanimals had the best times," he says over their farewell montage. "Running around the world like crazy. It's amazing." "Amazing Crazy Race," Jamal agrees, as though that's a thing. And the robot waves them along on their walk of shame, feeling just as terrible about their departure as I do.

Then there's the interviews from the final three going into the last leg. Jason says the race has brought him closer to Amy. Travis says that winning will take what he's been saying to Nicole the last few legs, though I don't understand the utility of "you are terrible at everything." And Marie says, "Jay & Amy, you're gonna have to climb out of Travis & Nicole's butts." True. Then she says that she and Tim work better under pressure than the other two remaining teams, a point underlined by footage of them screaming at each other over the date task in Abu Dhabi. And then, for the usual big-talk bit that closes out this segment, they all seem to think they're going to win. Two of them must be wrong.

"More than 35 million people live in and around Japan's capital city of Tokyo," Phil narrates as the second hour commences. "And in the center of this crowded metropolis, this one-thousand-year-old shrine, Konno Hachimangu, is the start of the twelfth and final leg in a race around the world." But who's counting? He reminds us that Tim & Marie won the previous leg, and so they are the first to start this one, at 6:08 AM. It's full daylight as they open a clue telling them to fly to their final destination of Juneau, Alaska. I like it when the final destination is a city I've been to. This isn't one of them. Phil says that's more than a 5,700 mile flight "across the world's largest ocean [as though they're going to have to row there on a galley boat] to America's last frontier, Alaska." After they land in Juneau, the capital city, they'll have to go to Douglas Island Harbor and take a marked boat to a place called Grizzly Bar to find their next clue. I'd say that Shane & Rowan would be disappointed to be missing Grizzly Bar, until they found out that it's a landform and not that kind of bar.

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Amazing Race




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