Amazing Race
A Confederacy of Dunces

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B- | Grade It Now!
Gone with the "1"

However, a GPS inside the cab is breaking down, and so are Ernie and Cindy when they hear another "Recalculating." And another. At any moment they're just going to go ahead and replace it with Allstate's mayhem guy.

This week's "Did you know" fact is that Atlanta has more than 65 streets named Peachtree. As a matter of fact I've been to Atlanta, and that number seems a little low to me. Not that I was scarred by it or anything.

After the commercials, Ernie and Cindy and Ben and Ben's deranged GPS are still looking for the entrance on Andrews (which presumably they'll have to turn onto from Peachtree) and trying to tune out the incessant "Recalculating." Jeremy and Sandy get back in their cab and tell their driver to take them to the Andrews Drive gate as fast as possible. Ernie and Cindy come up on Slayton, which Ben's GPS tells them to turn left on. Sandy asks their driver how far, and he says five miles. Or five minutes. Same thing. Either way it's just off Peachtree. Ernie reminds us that they have no idea where the other teams are. Sandy says they need to take Andrews, although it's not clear if they're actually there or not. Cindy finally spots the West Andrews street sign, and tells Ben to go that way. "Wait, wait, wait, don't get us killed, Ernie says as a horn blares. Whatever, dude, do you want the million dollars or what? Both teams are seen micromanaging their drivers on the last few turns, and we know they're close when we see a shot of the big SWAN HOUSE sign and Phil on the giant mat, the approach to which is flanked by teams eleven through four, all applauding for nobody. But then the ivy-covered wrought-iron gates at the entrance swing open come Ernie and Cindy, the winners.

Man, it seems like forever since I've seen some of these people. Ethan and Jenna? Laurence and Zac? The blonde twins? Has it been a much longer season than usual? My God, there's Kaylani and Lisa -- they were this season? Jennifer has new hair and Justin still has none. Cindy "Oh my Gods" all the way up to the mat, rising in pitch until she goes completely hypersonic as they drop their packs and join Phil. There's Bill and Cathi and Ron and Bill. Remember when there were two Bills? Phil tells them over the din of the cheering, "Four continents, ten countries [even with Germany I don't know how he gets to ten], twenty cities and more than 35,000 miles; Ernie and Cindy, you are the official winners of The Amazing Race and you have won the one million dollars! Congratulations!" The only thing that could make this moment better for them is if they threw an unused Express Pass at his feet.

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Amazing Race




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