Amazing Race
4 Continents, 24 Cities, 40,000 Miles

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: C+ | Grade It Now!
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Back to the (sucking) Windy City

Nuance gets a cab. And it's just that interesting.

Hornio and Hayden and Aaron find the tower, and the hours of operation don't start until 8:00. It's 5:10, so that should effectively wipe out everything up to this point, certainly. Kris and Jon show up, then Nuance. No time for footage of people sleeping or being awakened by the licking of puppies -- there is racing to be done!

In the morning, Chinese people frolic. A drum (logically enough) is pounded, and the teams walk in. Additional drumming ensues, and the teams make their way in a big clump to a clue box, where they retrieve the clue for a Detour. (Nice clue-ripping sequence, by the way. The editing has been pretty dull this go-round, but I liked that.) Phil explains that the choices are Spray and Scroll. In Spray, you travel about 34 miles to a car factory, and you spray-paint a car. In Scroll, you go to a fabric factory and search through ten bolts of fabric on a light table, looking for little Chinese characters that say, "MORON! THIS DETOUR OPTION IS MUCH HARDER!" All the teams, unsurprisingly, choose Spray.

Taxi-hunting ensues. Kris and Jon, weirdly, seem to get screwed by two consecutive cabs that pick up other teams instead of them. Kendra, unsurprisingly, crows about this in the cab once she and Freddy are on their way, because she's nothing if not graceless at every opportunity. And what she says, that Kris and Jon were "nowhere near" the cab, is bullshit anyway, because you can see that Jon hails the cab and they run over and cut him off. I mean, if you're going to poach, poach, but don't be a pussy about it, you know? Anyway, Kris and Jon wind up being the last to get a cab, and inside, Kris expresses some surprise that they kept getting "snaked" by other teams with cabs. Which was kind of weird indeed. She does note that "what goes around, comes around," and the world would certainly be a better place if that were more consistently true. In the Hornio cab, Rebecca is lecturing El Hornio about how he has to put on the uniform at the car factory really quickly, because apparently, she might forget to nag later. It's like layaway nagging.

Hayden, meanwhile, is unhappy that they don't see any other teams, and is beginning to think it might be a wild goose chase of the Chinese variety. She then instructs Aaron to be more upset about what's going on. "I'm getting upset, and I need you to do something about it," she orders. Well, that's productive. When he fails to jump, and in fact chuckles bitterly instead, she whimpers, "Do you not care?" I swear, she's like an ad for Boy Repellent in every traditional way I know of. I just do not understand this relationship. Aaron tells her that they're at the mercy of the driver, and they'll just have to "have faith that he knows where he's going." Over in their cab, Kris and Jon say basically the same thing, even using the same "mercy of the cab driver" expression. Maybe there's a sign on the back of the driver's seat that says that -- "Remember, You Are At The Mercy Of Your Driver" -- and they're just taking the hint.

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Amazing Race

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