Clip Show

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: C | Grade It Now!
Retro Revival

Happy Turkey Day, folks! In an hour's time, you can give thanks that you'll never have to see this footage again! As for tonight's clip show, I'd love to believe we're in for some real excitement: Haute havoc! Couture chaos! Anne-archy! But I suspect that it'll just be more whining, sniping, and general incompetence. So now, because it wasn't tedious enough the first time, the Stylista mid-season recap...

The crack edit team repurposes the exact same intro from the first episode, substituting Anne's narration for vaguely Nigel Barker-y guy. Before the show begins, though, there is a quick montage of the season's lowlights, including Megan shrieking "FAB-U-LOUS!" in imitation of Ashlie's loudmouth schmuckery. If it had come from anyone less ass-y, it might have been a valid point (albeit utterly stereotypical and tinged with racism). And so Anne concludes that the remaining five competitors have their eyes on the prize(s): a year-long editorial position at ELLE -- if it hasn't folded by then; a free apartment for a year -- if this cheap-ass show can still swing rent, and a one-year clothing allowance from H&M, amounting to precisely $137 and a Punky Brewster lunchbox.

And so the clip show mash-up begins. The underlings came, they met. (FYI: In the interest of brevity -- and my sanity -- I'm going to try to take a Slowey-certified minimalist approach and link to any previously-viewed action that isn't new, interesting, or worth viciously hazing.) In short, Megan was bitchy and judgmental. Devin was nicer than she needed to be. Kate was dismissed for her underwhelming experience and overwhelming melons. Dyshaun was a snarky, fey worshiper at the altar of Megan. Not much has changed, eh?

Brett and Malina gave the minions their first dose of reality: Assistant Task! This one involved fetching breakfast. Super-brain Megan staged an impromptu sit-in (though I prefer to think of it as a "snit-in") to protest this lowly errand... that is, until Malina told her to stand her impertinent ass up. William TH's that Megan was "insane" for being so blatantly disrespectful. Well I've got news for you, Wild Bill: People in clown suits shouldn't tweak others' noses, mmmmmkay? Megan, because she is never in the wrong, thought this was a targeted attack, launched specifically to demean her and strike fear in the hearts of the other lowlifes.

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