Siberia
“…Into the Oven”

Episode Report Card
Monty Ashley: D+ | 122 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
And Then!

Joyce checks out Irene's leg wound, and it's looking much better. It's all due to the magical Indian herbs! I realize "Indian" is the wrong word. It's not even the right word for Native Americans, and these people were Native Siberians. Or Indigenous People of Siberia. Or just "Evenki," but that word doesn't have the resonance to play into the "magical herbs" thing the show is doing. Let's just move on. The radio is hooked up again. Sam is on the comm, since he speaks Russian. And there's a truck coming! Miljan runs in, zipping up his pants. Esther also comes out of a bathroom stall.

Everyone streams out of the building and is met by a bunch of guys in riot armor with automatic weapons. This rescue isn't going well! Even though they keep saying, "We called you!" they're still forced down on the ground. But since people were coming out of different doors, not everyone has been taken captive. Esther (and her camera crew) are watching through a window. Daniel and Johnny (and their camera crew) walk around a corner, see what's going on, and pull back. I am obliged, for what I hope is the last time, to point out that we can clearly see the scene, and there are no camera crews among the people kneeling in the snow, even though there are some shots from that vantage point. A shot rings out, and we go to commercial.

The guy in charge says some things in Russian. Esther gets brought out to kneel with the others. The soldiers are talking in Russian. Sam says they're looking for a weapon, although they don't care about the dead bodies inside. They're the ones that killed them. I told you they should have checked the security footage!

Johnny and Daniel peep through a window. Daniel wants to do something, but Johnny reminds him about the guns.

Outside, there's more shouting. Nobody knows what these people want. Joyce stands up, and that causes an absolute storm of shouting. Daniel wants to use the radio to call for help. He already tried that, and look what happened. Joyce tries explaining that they're contestants on a reality show, which is hard to believe. She promises that the kneeling people constitute their entire population. Inside, Daniel tries various frequencies to no avail. And then! A window breaks! The camera operator goes to check it out and sees a gun barrel coming through the door. This causes more shouting outside, and they tell Joyce she lied. Her hands get tied to the truck's hood. A gun is held to her head and everyone huddles.

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Siberia

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