Real Housewives of New Jersey
In the Name of the Father

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Five Guys Named Joe

Across the Hudson in Manhattan, Jacqueline visits her brat of a daughter Ashley at her new job at Lizzie Grubman PR. Bratshley introduces Jacqueline to Lizzie, and the first words out of Lizzie's mouth are that Bratshley doesn't come into work on a regular basis. Uffo! Bratshley hems and haws about how commuting is hard and costs money. Her solution, you'll be shocked to learn, is not to realize she's 19 damn years old and suck it up. No. She thinks she should move into the city. Blindsided, Jacqueline's all, "With whose money? Remember how I was a single mother and actually had responsibilities back in the day? Maybe you should work for that which you feel so dreadfully entitled." Except she says it a lot more nicely than I ever would because she's Jacqueline, and she's a pushover. Bratshley starts crying and runs away, proving that she is clearly not emotionally mature enough to handle living in the city.

Lizzie runs in to coddle her, which just makes her cry more. Jacqueline follows close behind. Bratshley thinks Jacqueline was talking down to her. She asks Jacqueline to leave her alone for a minute. Lizzie says Bratshley is a lot like her, minus the violence. Bratshley's all, "Well there was that one time..." Lizzie says she, too, dropped out of college, but she proved everyone wrong by using her dad's money to start a PR firm and escaping virtually consequence free from mowing down partygoers in the Hamptons. So, buck up, young thing. Don't let a little rip-and-run and absolutely no gumption get you down! You, too, can be an asshole who looks like ET and sends out the world's worst press releases! Don't dream it, be it.

Bratshley barely pulls herself together to meet Chris for lunch. Bratshley whines of going to work, "The whole process is annoying! I have to wake up early! I have to come into the office! I'm here until six!" Yeah, sweet cheeks, it's called work for a reason. Jacqueline says as much, so Bratshley lashes out at her. Jacqueline says she's tired of trying to nudge Bratshley in the right direction (read: responsibility and not being a waste of space). Chris says he did whatever it took to get to work when he was younger. Bratshley claims she's doing the same but shuts down completely when asked for specifics. Chris says in frustration, "Then keep doing what you're doing." Snipes Jacqueline, "It's working for you..." Bratshley defensively tells her to she doesn't know anything. Well, she certainly knows how to raise a weave-pulling shrew. Chris gets down to nuts and bolts. If you're late, leave earlier! Simple as that. He meets her halfway, offering to pay for her commute if she takes the job seriously. The incentive of doing so is that she'll possibly get a paying job out of the deal, then she can save until she can afford an apartment in the city. He tells her to set goals and work toward them.

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Real Housewives of New Jersey

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