Death & The Maiden

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 23 USERS: A-
Let Me Into Your Window
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!


Everybody died! It was because of a gross demon girl that only Miranda can see. The Matheson Twins and their mom are the Toby Cavanaughs of town, a real rum bunch ever since Mom stabbed Dad; Remy's hot on the trail of the weird Curse that killed everybody; and Uncle Collins is all kinds of vampire nonsense. But The Grunwald abides.


After some quick work by the EMTs -- thanks for saving Olivia, dudes! -- everybody is dry and freaking out, except Miranda. So they sit around and bitch about Miranda.

Olivia: "Nice work killing all of us, Remy!"
Remy: "It was Miranda! I was just grooving to the Civil Wars and then she starts screaming. I couldn't stop her from driving us off the road."
Caleb: "Why did she do that, do you think?"
Remy: "Listen, that bridge was completely clear of demon girls from where I was sitting."

Doctors: "Well, we're losing Miranda. I guess her coming here was a bad idea."
Miranda: "I wish I wasn't the one that got away. Bye, you guys."

And so it is that Miranda drives off that last bridge. The one we call life. Everybody cries even though nobody really dug her because they didn't know how great she was. Not even her uncle got it. Caleb got it, but it didn't help. RIP Miranda Collins.

Olivia: "It really sucked when we drowned a minute ago. But I guess it's cool that we all lived. And changed into scrubs during the title card even though our clothes were already dry."
Caleb: "So wait, I can go back to Rosewood now? I better call Hanna."

Doctor: "Remy, I need to take your blood for some reason."
Remy: "No problem."
Caleb: "Problem! You have to wait for parental consent!"
Luke: "Caleb, why are you being weird about blood samples?"
Caleb: "Because of my Rosewood PTSD! They take your blood, next thing you know they're smearing it on field hockey sticks and you're in jail for finding a shovel!"
Police Chief: "No, we actually have cops here in Ravenswood, not just high school dropout voyeurs with video cameras in a secret society."
Caleb: "Fine, I will calm down."

Remy's Parents: "Thank goodness you didn't die!"
Dad: "Luke was in the car? That pisses me off more than that car going in the river, or if you had died."

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