Queer as Folk U.S.
You Say It's Your Birthday! I Couldn't Care Less!

Episode Report Card
Pamie: D+ | Grade It Now!
Ted, Just Admit It

Previously: Brian became a superhero. Mel and Lindsay took in Leda. Emmett tried to crash his ex-boyfriend's funeral. Ben talked for forever.

Justin doesn't even appear to need a computer anymore. He's showing Michael the latest sketches of the gay-bashing episode of their comic book. Michael whines that it's "kinda gory." Justin snaps that it's "supposed to be." Ben searches between them for his Palm Pilot. Now Justin and Michael are screwing up Ben's place as well? I can't even tell you what's going on because the camera's in such an extreme close-up while they're talking that I just end up counting pores. I am suddenly the carrot stick going into Michael's mouth. I'm the tiny blond sideburn resting on Justin's earlobe. I'm the particle of dust settling on Ben's eyeglasses, just at the crook of his nose. Why do I have to be this close to the action? We see a few graphic drawings of Brian and Justin having sex. The one that's supposed to be Justin apparently has no pubic hair or dick. Oh, they're at Michael's place. Ben asks again for his Palm Pilot, and Michael tells him to try his bedroom. Michael says it might have dropped out of his pocket as he dropped his pants. Except we have to watch the scene from inside Michael's mouth. Ben's right nostril compliments Michael's good thinking. We are inside their kiss, covered in saliva, and Ben walks away. Michael slides his hand under Justin's notepad and comes up with Ben's Palm Pilot. He's stolen it so he can take down all of Ben's phone numbers for a surprise birthday party. Justin completely freaks out when he learns that he and Ben share a birthday. Like he found out they're brothers or something. "Isn't that the most amazing coincidence?" Justin says it's pretty amazing that both Brian and Michael are in love with guys who have the same birthday. They're also in love with each other, so I don't see what the big deal is. Hardly a coincidence. Both guys with the same birthday have slept with Brian. Is that a big coincidence? Not really, since probably about fifty other guys with the same birthday have done the same thing. Ben walks back in and moans, "No luck in the bedroom." "That's a first!" Michael says as I want to jam that carrot stick into his mouth until he chokes. The camera keeps making quick zooms in, like it's still trying to focus and figure out how to frame the shot. It's not like anything's happening in this scene that calls for this kind of drama. It's like watching a student film. I even look to see if the boom mic is in the way. Michael invites Justin for dinner, since Ben's cooking and that won't cost any money for Michael or Justin. Ben says that afterwards, they're going to watch Sunset Boulevard. He says it like he might just think it's porn. Justin can't stay because he's got a date with Brian at Babylon. Ben and Michael make out in front of Justin, rubbing it in that they have a domesticated relationship while Justin and Brian are hustler roommates.

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Queer as Folk U.S.




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