Private Practice

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DeAnn Welker: D- | Grade It Now!
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The Amazing Addison
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

We once again begin on the ocean and then we zoom to a rugged area where Sam and Addison are hiking. Again. Addison's complaining about marriage, and how stupid it is: a financial transaction. Sam agrees that most of them end in divorce, like both of theirs. Basically: Marriage is stupid, and they hate it. Life is so hard when you're crazy beautiful and rich. They think their lives are good, and totally theirs. For example, last night Addison stayed home with her cat and watched National Geographic Channel. Addison needs sex, but mostly just the flutter you get when you first meet someone. Sam makes her stop, and then they sit. Sam admits he needs it, too, but she better not tell anyone. Then he does the unthinkable and the predictable and makes up a backstory in which he asked Addison out in med school, but she said no because Naomi had a crush on him. He wonders what if... would they have made it? This pisses me off for so many reasons, not the least of which is that it belittles Naomi to tell us that he only went to her as a second choice after Addison turned him down. Plus, it's never been mentioned, which makes it even more idiotic. Anyway, I try not to listen to the made-up-so-Addison-can-have-another-hottie backstory, but then tune back in when they hear someone cry out from nearby.

They take off running and find a bloody guy collapsed. He says, "My wife." Sam tells Addison the guy's pulse and respiratory rate are rapid, and he's losing a lot of blood out of a wound on his side. Addison can't get a cell signal on her phone or Sam's to call the wife he's asking about, but then he clarifies she's in the car that he crashed; he was trying to get help. Addison heads further down the rugged hill and finds a badly crashed car with a woman inside. She appears to be dead, but she looks up when Addison searches for a pulse. It's Ever Carradine, who's happy to see Addison because she thinks it means her husband got out and got help. Oh, and Ever's extremely pregnant. Addison wants to get her out of the car, but her arm's stuck, and has been since yesterday, so her fingers are starting to get tingly. Ever freaks that it's just Addison and her friend, Sam, and not a search party coming to get her out. Addison asks when Ever's due date is. Today. Dramatic music leads us into the sunny opening title card. I will never get used to how jarring the sunny, happy title is after these big dramatic moments.

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Private Practice

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