Private Practice

Episode Report Card
Cindy McLennan: B+ | Grade It Now!
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Eeny Meeny Miney Moe
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!
Hi, everyone. I'm your substitute recapper this week, and want to confess right off the bat that this is the first episode of Private Practice I've ever watched. To make matters worse, I've never watched an episode of Grey's Anatomy, either. In my defense, I am a recovering soap opera addict, so I'm pretty sure I can still ride the bike.

We open in on the famous HOLLYWOOD sign and pan to a Spanish influenced condo complex reminds me of the one Laverne and Shirley moved to when they left Milwaukee for California and completely ruined the show. A wet-haired Violet, wearing a colorful floral robe and her glasses opens to the door to find a smiling Sheldon, who shushes her and tells her not to scare the erection. Violet - here's what you do - say, "Okay," and gently shut the door, lock the door, and call the police. Sheldon brags, "It's up, Violet. Full mast." Okay. I was expecting a soap, not Soap.

Inexplicably, Violet leaves the door open and actually talks to him. "I thought you just wanted to be friends."

Sheldon says, "I did. But a week of friendship - and it looks like I'm over my issue. Heh. Heh. Heh....Is this okay?" NO! Not okay. Er...to me. Violet apparently feels differently.

When he starts blathering on about how this is embarrassing and he shouldn't have, I nod vigorously while Violet moves in for a kiss. So...Judging Amy stars and Judgment-free Violet, then? Okay. I pause on the kiss only to realize Amy Brenneman needs a facial, stat. Amy, I get that they wanted to show you fresh from the shower, but talk to the DP about some more flattering light, or something.

Charlotte stands alone in the elevator at Oceanside Wellness - looking down, looking grim, looking hot. Cooper (in shades) hustles for the door, asking her to hold it, and slips in before the doors shut. When the black cloud over her head obscures his view of the elevator buttons, he says she looks like someone died. Charlotte corrects him. "Dying. Big Daddy." Cooper makes great hay with this, assuming Charlotte has a Sugar Daddy with one foot in the grave and the other on a banana peel, but Charlotte's Southern, y'all, so she talks like she's straight out of Cat On A Hot Tin Roof (which Cooper also references, but I swear I said it aloud in my living room, first). Anyhow, Big Daddy is Charlotte's father - her father who is dying of cancer. As a soap opera fan who's been through the trenches, I recognize the need to disconnect from real people with real cancer so I'm taking a moment. And? (I loathe medical shows) I'm done. Okay. Now. So Cooper feels like ass and he should. Charlotte exits the elevator which allows Coop some cringe time.

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Private Practice

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