Episode Report Card
Al Lowe: B+ | 1 USERS: A+
The Sisterhood of Bad Idea Jeans

In classic Braverman style, his promise not to tell anyone is broken immediately. "That son-of-a-bitch," Kristina says, on hearing the news later at Adam's office. "How could he do this to her?" Adam asks. "How?" Kristina says she doesn't know -- the same way any guy does it to their wives. "Maybe low self-esteem?" she says. "They take those little blue pills that make their... things go..." Haa! Kristina has the best ad libs. Adam says yeah, well, whatever the case, it's not genetic. "Because I would never, ever do that to you," he says. Kristina says she never would have thought that he would. "It makes me sick," Adam says. Kristina agrees that it is sickening, especially because Zeek is in their house right now. She resolves not to say anything about it or act weird around him. She asks if Adam is going to tell Julia or Crosby. He puts his head in his hands and says he doesn't think so.

At the high school, Amber's day has gone from bad to worse as she faces the soul-killing reality of losing money in a vending machine. She is just about to karate chop the thing when Steve sidles up, asking if they can talk about what happened. "No," she says, and shoots him totally down, saying he needs to stop talking to her and leave her alone. Across the way, Haddie sees all this and smiles to herself, no doubt thinking Steve was hassling Amber about her.

The sibs meet for... lunch? I guess? At their usual diner. Y'all, sometimes the freestyle banter really gets on my nerves. Anyway, Julia mentions that she has called Timm and that they'll be meeting for second lunch to discuss the real estate deal. "What's a second lunch?" Crosby asks. Julia says it's something you do when you don't wear shorts to work. Uh, I have never had a job where I wore shorts to work (except this one, to which I don't even wear shorts, har har) and I have never heard of "second lunch." Does Julia work for a Hobbit law firm? The Firm of Baggins, Took and... Crookshanks? What? I couldn't think of one. (Oh, all right, I am kidding. I love all those books and the films, full-on nerd-style.) Anyway, Google is no help. Is this a real thing? At my last office, we called our 3 p.m. snack strike a second lunch. Incidentally, 3 p.m. is a deadly time of day in an office full of women. Julia, in any case, reiterates her determination to save Zeek and their parents' marriage. Meanwhile, Sarah shares the news about Camille's insistence that they clean their stuff out of the attic. Crosby immediately jumps on this, asking if that includes the piano he has stored up there. Why (and how) anyone would put a piano in an attic is beyond my comprehension, but most importantly, why (and how) Crosby wants to put it on his houseboat, is beyond reality. Julia agrees with me on this point. "What are you, the zoning commission?" Crosby asks. Adam wonders when Crosby became so sentimental about this piano he learned to play on. They agree that the piano thing is the least of their worries. "Adam," Julia says. "I will solve Dad's financial problems. I got this. I will." Adam smiles sadly. "I know you will," he says.

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