MONDO EXTRAS

Staff Flick Picks

by The Editors August 16, 2007
The Movies On Cable We Can't Resist

It's Bull Durham. And, praise the Lord, it is on every weekend. Someone at your local cable company loves you. You settle in, not just for Susan Sarandon's nip slip in the last thirty minutes; not just to see Meat bring the Heat; not just to bone up on the use of your "pridal eye;" but to remind yourself that this game? This game is fun goddammit. It's fun. It's full of the ontological truths of our time, and so is this film. Like baseball, it teaches us important lessons: Stand up for your beliefs. Soft-core porn is okay. Strikeouts are fascist. A live rooster can get you out of a lot of jams. And a film as good as this one comes along about as often as the Cubs win a pennant.

--Al Lowe

When Lane Meyer (John Cusack) is dumped by his girlfriend, Beth, for the Sun-In blond, guitar-playing, turtleneck-wearing Ken Doll of a ski team captain, he decides that he would be Better Off Dead than try and get through high school without her. However when the extension-cord noose is around his neck, he changes his mind, because, heck!, he hasn't even seen New York City! Unfortunately, his mother inadvertently vacuums him off the ledge he's perched on and he almost hangs himself. When he gets untangled, he decides to try to get over Beth and get off the suicide kick, but it is hard when he is plagued by requests from everyone from his Geometry teacher to the mailman to Barney from the Flintstones asking him if they can take out his ex! Not even the forced drag racing with the Japanese brothers (one who speaks no English, the other who learned English from watching Howard Cosell on Wide World Of Sports), the homicidal paperboy desperately seeking his two dollars, his mother's cuisine of mystery, a Christmas highlighted by a huge stack of TV Dinners and a coat made of Real Aardvark Fur!, and his father's attempts at cheering him up (dates with his partner's head-gear sporting, calculator-wielding daughter and a job that requires him to wear a pig hat) can distract him from the pain of seeing Beth with her new boyfriend.

Lane decides he must win her back, so when his inventively drug-addled best friend (who has been attending high school for seven years and is no dummy) recommends skiing the famed K12 mountain to impress her, Lane decides to do it. While his first attempt is a raucous failure, his friend is thrilled by the discovery that the entire mountain is made of snow! Unfortunately, between that fiasco, a hilariously efficient thwarted forced date, and a high-school dance so bad that a Samantha Fox performance is the high point, Lane's thoughts return to suicide. He is swigging a jar of paint primer when he accidentally blows up his neighbor's mom during a French-themed dinner party (French fries, French dressing, Perrier, what else do you need?). While she is recuperating, Lane must ferry her tubby, ungainly, mixed plaid-wearing son Ricky and the French exchange student to school. During yet another disastrous drag race on the way to school, the exchange student, Monique, and Lane strike up a friendship. In her eagerness to get out of the clutches of the lovestruck Ricky, Monique becomes the catalyst Lane needs to get back on his skis, get his bitchin' Camaro running, make it down K12 (on one ski!), and banish all thoughts of Beth and suicide.

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Staff Flick Picks

by The Editors August 16, 2007
The Movies On Cable We Can’t Resist It's Bull Durham. And, praise the Lord, it is on every weekend. Someone at your local cable company loves you. You settle in, not just for Susan Sarandon's nip slip in the last thirty minutes; not just to see Meat bring the Heat; not just to bone up on the use of your "pridal eye;" but to remind yourself that this game? This game is fun goddammit. It's fun. It's full of the ontological truths of our time, and so is this film. Like baseball, it teaches us important lessons: Stand up for your beliefs. Soft-core porn is okay. Strikeouts are fascist. A live rooster can get you out of a lot of jams. And a film as good as this one comes along about as often as the Cubs win a pennant. --Al Lowe When Lane Meyer (John Cusack) is dumped by his girlfriend, Beth, for the Sun-In blond, guitar-playing, turtleneck-wearing Ken Doll of a ski team captain, he decides that he would be Better Off Dead than try and get through high school without her. However when the extension-cord noose is around his neck, he changes his mind, because, heck!, he hasn't even seen New York City! Unfortunately, his mother inadvertently vacuums him off the ledge he's perched on and he almost hangs himself. When he gets untangled, he decides to try to get over Beth and get off the suicide kick, but it is hard when he is plagued by requests from everyone from his Geometry teacher to the mailman to Barney from the Flintstones asking him if they can take out his ex! Not even the forced drag racing with the Japanese brothers (one who speaks no English, the other who learned English from watching Howard Cosell on Wide World Of Sports), the homicidal paperboy desperately seeking his two dollars, his mother's cuisine of mystery, a Christmas highlighted by a huge stack of TV Dinners and a coat made of Real Aardvark Fur!, and his father's attempts at cheering him up (dates with his partner's head-gear sporting, calculator-wielding daughter and a job that requires him to wear a pig hat) can distract him from the pain of seeing Beth with her new boyfriend. Lane decides he must win her back, so when his inventively drug-addled best friend (who has been attending high school for seven years and is no dummy) recommends skiing the famed K12 mountain to impress her, Lane decides to do it. While his first attempt is a raucous failure, his friend is thrilled by the discovery that the entire mountain is made of snow! Unfortunately, between that fiasco, a hilariously efficient thwarted forced date, and a high-school dance so bad that a Samantha Fox performance is the high point, Lane's thoughts return to suicide. He is swigging a jar of paint primer when he accidentally blows up his neighbor's mom during a French-themed dinner party (French fries, French dressing, Perrier, what else do you need?). While she is recuperating, Lane must ferry her tubby, ungainly, mixed plaid-wearing son Ricky and the French exchange student to school. During yet another disastrous drag race on the way to school, the exchange student, Monique, and Lane strike up a friendship. In her eagerness to get out of the clutches of the lovestruck Ricky, Monique becomes the catalyst Lane needs to get back on his skis, get his bitchin' Camaro running, make it down K12 (on one ski!), and banish all thoughts of Beth and suicide.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13Next

Comments

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