Masters of Sex
Standard Deviation

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 39 USERS: A
YOU GRADE IT
Roughing It
Bill: "The mysteries of human sexuality are such that she went back to Tennessee."
Scully: "Did you know that nobody ever studied sex before?"
Bill: "I'm like George Mallory, I do it because it is there. Dimly, off in the distance, and I'm going to need oxygen, but it's there."
Scully: "Mount Everest doesn't ejaculate, Bill."
Bill: "That's just one of the many things my research will help us determine."

"The real truth is, I don't know anything about sex. And you don't either. But wouldn't you like to know? I mean wouldn't everyone like to know some answers? Wouldn't we all be so much better off if we could shine a light into the darkness?"

SEGUE

In 1958, Bill directs a lamp up Mae Whitman's skirt and they talk about family planning.

Beth: "I'm Beth, I'm getting married soon! I worry about my weight. #Justgirlythings."
Bill: "I don't understand that, and I won't respond to it."
Beth: "Well, when we get married, we're going to be doing it."
Bill: "It is a thing about marriage."
Beth: "I have three semesters left at Maryville and a husband named Willard who is not leaning in."
Bill: "Ah. Family planning began with the ancient Inuit, who would throw unwanted babies into the Arctic Sea..."
Beth: "I don't... Is this a joke? Are you joking?"
Bill: "Fast-forward, now we have modern birth control. Do you know this is?"

He unrolls a condom onto a fake dick, and she blanches. She did not.

Bill: "Or there are a wide variety of like, creams and jellies..."
Beth: "Like marmalade?"
Bill: "Are you retarded?"
Beth: "No, just in over my head. Can a sister get a diaphragm in here or what?"
Bill: "There we go. A little rubber bowler hat. Perfectly fitted to your specific cervix."
Beth: "What is a cervix?"
Bill: "Get out of my office."

LATER

Gini: "I'm still hypercompetent and vastly overqualified for like any job on Earth. I replaced one of our hookers with another hooker, so tonight's schedule is just chock full of hookers..."
Bill: "I'm still dismissive and remote because everything is weird. I hope your feelings are hurt. Anyway, go to the Laundry Department and pick up a lab coat for Dr. DePaul."

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Masters of Sex

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