Mad Men

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B- | 3 USERS: A-
It's a Gi…Boy!

...we cut to Don and Hobart manhandling the cigarette machine. Hey, as long as that's what it's into. With the assistance of a candy striper, they finally succeed in retrieving the pack of smokes that Don ostensibly paid for, and when the non-speaking girl is gone, Hobart mildly leers after her before getting emotional, saying that his wife was screaming at him in the car, and she's in there now and he can't bear the thought of something happening to her, and he doesn't know how he could love the baby if he or she cost his wife her life. Perhaps the actor is so distraught that he's forgotten how to do convincing business with a cigarette, because the way he's holding the thing would cause Paul and possibly Peggy to come running over in anticipation of getting high. Don then puts a hand on the guy's back and intones, "Our worst fears lie in anticipation, " and it's all so manly and fraternal that I'll refrain from putting a different potential spin on the scene by noting that he last heard those words from a flaming homosexual. Except for the part where I kind of just did.

Betty's continuing her season-long quest to get her mouth washed out with soap as she calls the nurse a bitch while physically struggling with her and asking where Don is. The doctor claims that Betty can't hear the nurse, but Betty snarls, "The hell I can't!" Get this baby out of her, stat! The nurse tells her he's in the waiting room, but Betty replies, "Bullshit. He's never where you expect him to be." Sounds like there's potential for a Where's Don? book, only I don't think it would exactly be child-appropriate. She asks the nurse if she's been with him, and Betty, given that the nurse has seen what Don looks like you might not want to plant such distracting thoughts in her head at the moment. The nurse pumps her IV full of Demerol, and Betty murmurs, "I'm just a housewife. Why are you doing this to me?" before the darkness takes her again.

Don, meanwhile, is barely more conscious than his wife, thanks in at least part to the now-empty bottle of Scotch at his side, but he notices when half of Debra Jo Rupp wakes Hobart up and informs him that his wife and baby boy are doing just fine, although his wife is in recovery from the transfusion she ended up needing. This means Hobart will have to wait to see her, but he is given leave to meet his son. Before he goes, though, he tells Don he's sure his kid will be all right too, and then moves close and puts an open hand on Don's cheek: "You're an honest guy. Believe me -- I'm an expert." Don's face is like, "Thanks for the compliment, but I'm worried you just sentenced my kid to death." Hobart emotionally tells Don that this is a fresh start for him, and he's going to be a better man, and it's all very lovely but I don't really need a bit character dragging out sentiments like this, so let's head into the commercial break.

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Mad Men




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