Judging Amy
Crowded House

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Crowded House

Okay, so we've got everything set up for this week, right? Maxine has the woman who wants to hurt her child, Vincent has to write a great story in four days, Gillian hates Peter and is still worked up over her infertility, Peter is a jerk, Amy has a David E. Kelley, The Practice-style Krazy Killer Kase, and Lauren loves Leesha, a fact which fills Amy with a murderous and angry rage. Everyone straight on that? All righty, then.

In the kitchen, Maxine gushes about Vincent's good news. Amy, demonstrating a remarkable sensitivity, asks if Gillian is okay. Maxine snaps out of her pro-Vincent stupor and apologizes for being "insensitive" with the "children paying off" comment. Gillian says she knows Maxine didn't mean it that way, and then Peter proves who the really insensitive member of the family is by asking if Gillian can just "drop the baby thing for one night." She turns around and snaps at him, asking if he thinks "the baby thing" is "some kind of hobby." Amy takes Peter's plate of pie away from him and tells him to "take a break." He extrapolates that they would like him to leave, a hypothesis Maxine proves by telling him to "go!" He waddles off. I hate him. Gillian tells Amy and Maxine that she's thinking of spending some time apart from Peter. Like, apart, apart. For a weekend. Or a month. Or the rest of her life. Amy muses that time apart could do them some good. Maxine, however, insists that Gillian attempt first to talk it out with her stupid son. She sends Gillian to do just that, and as soon as her daughter-in-law has slumped, dejected and depressed, from the kitchen, lays into Amy for suggesting that Gillian and Peter separate. Amy explains that she didn't actually mean they ought to undergo a legal separation, but that maybe they just need some time to cool off. Maxine snaps that "people who separate don't get back together," and uses Amy and Michael as her exhibit A. As Amy begins her "I was just trying to help" defense, Vincent lopes into the kitchen, asking which of them made Gillian cry, and explaining that "she and Peter are sitting in the dark like two characters in a Russian play." Maxine throws her dish towel aside and exclaims that she "has to fix this!" and that she won't watch her family fall apart. She gnaws on some scenery on her way out of the shot. Amy looks disgusted. Vincent hands her a huge glass of wine. Judging Amy is brought to you tonight by Ernest and Julio Gallo.

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Judging Amy

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