Jersey Shore
Meatball Mashup

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: B | Grade It Now!

Previously: Snooki touted her Rain Man-like driving skills. Dina went a little Silkwood. Jionni proved to be but a towel shift away from Sleeping with the Enemy.

We return mid-conversation as JWOWW and Ronnie are trying to convince Snooki to break up with Jionni, but Snooki isn't having it. Obviously she is the kind of person who hates being told what to do and would cut her own hand off if you told her to keep it attached to her body. So it makes sense when she says she hates work because, in addition to the fact that she's permanently hung-over, the entire point of work is being told what to do. Ronnie, on the other hand, is lovin' himself some work because the bosses have taken drugs or something and decided it would be a good idea to give him a bullhorn with which to sexually harass the women of Florence. How do you say "Work it?" in Italian because that's the kind of verbal gem Ronnie is throwing out to try to sell pizza.

Back inside, JWOWW and Snooki talk about the weekend trip the whole gang is taking to Riccione. JWOWW says she's excited to get in her bikini and check out the Speedo-clad uomini. Two words, WOWW: "Banana amaca." Learn it, use it, live it. Ronnie chats with their boss about Riccione, and it seems he spent many a lost weekend there, so Ronnie knows he'll be all set. JWOWW says she wants to go shopping, so their boss unwisely gives them a 15-minute break. Stop me if you've heard this story before... Long story short, it ends with the boss wandering the streets whimpering "Ronnie" like he lost his puppy. He does eventually find them, and I hope he's learned a lesson. Snooki hasn't, though, because she has adopted another ill-advised fashion choice in her Gaga circa 2008 chain sunglasses

They head home, and Snooki calls Jionni even though she admits she's afraid to. He's immediately on the warpath about how "beyond beyond beyond beyond beyond beyond beyond rude" she was to him the night before? What, by telling him how much she loves him? And putting up with his macho bullshit? She reports how all her roommates think he was the rude one, and he decides they're crazy. A modern Galileo is Jionni. Everyone else is wrong, and he's right! He gets pissy and tells her he's not going to come to Italy after all. She actually seems pretty unbothered by it, though he wouldn't know because he hangs up before she can respond. She gets up, declaring him a douchebag. Hear, hear!

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Jersey Shore




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