Jersey Shore
Like More Than a Friend

Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: B | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
Don't Smush Where You Eat

They eventually reach their destination. Sammi thinks it's just like Domino's, which is a bit akin to saying El Bulli is just like El Pollo Loco, but whatever. JWOWW looks forward to the day she can be making pizza with her children and grandchildren. They'll asks, "Where did you learn how to make pizza, grandWOWW?" Her response (direct quote): "Bitch, I made it in Florence. That's where I made it, so shut your mouth and enjoy my pizza." Oh, JWOWW! I, too, often dream of verbally abusing my loved ones of the future!

Marco asks Snooki to volunteer and help him make a pizza. She says she wants pepperoni on the pizza, so Marco asks if she means sweet peppers or hot salami. Vinny: "She loves hot salami!" Nonetheless, our little Snickers soldiers on even through what she perceives as a crippling language barrier. To be frank, I understand Marco better than I understand most of the housemates. Snooki successfully makes her pie and Ronnie, always a class-act says, "I mean, if Snooki can do, we all can do it. You know what I mean?" The worst part is that he starts laughing at his own trite little attempt at a joke. Like he just re-invented the frickin' knock-knock joke or something. Vocabulary lesson! The Italian word for "blowhard" is sbruffone. It may be used in a sentence, such as Ronaldo รจ uno sbruffone.

The kids head back home where JWOWW decides she wants to make coffee. Since she can't find a grinder, she decides to use what appears to be a meat tenderizer, crushing a handful of beans at a time. Needless to say, this is a failed experiment.

And then it's time to go out yet again. As soon as they get there, The Situation finds himself a Britney from Florida. Snooki inexplicably gets possessive and starts trash-talking Britney to Sitch, who dismisses her insults and returns to the easy lay. The kids gets to drinking, and Ronnie drops his signature moves on the floor. He steps away from the groove for a minute to tell JWOWW that his trick Hannah will be coming in a couple of weeks. JWOWW asks Pauly about Ronnie's "back-up chick," and he doesn't really know anything about it. They both worry what Sammi is going to think.

Ronnie returns to the dance floor, acknowledging that he's "in rare form." Pauly says he hasn't seen him this sloppy since his "single Ronnie" days in Miami. At one point he heads into the bathroom and thrusts his ape-like six pack on poor unsuspecting Britney. Then he declares, "I am the pimp daddy mack of this whole place." All the while he has an indeterminate piece of refuse stuck to his eyelid. He heads back outside and brags to Vinny that he pounded out four girls in three days before they traveled to Italy. Well, I guess I should clarify: Technically, he's talking to Vinny, but it's clear his intended audience is Sammi. Instead of ignoring him, she takes the bait, and things get real tense, real fast. Out of nowhere. Sammi walks off to cry to Snooki while Vinny takes Ronnie aside and tells him not to stir up shit, drunk or sober.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6Next

Jersey Shore

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP