How I Met Your Mother

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Cindy McLennan: B+ | 2 USERS: A+
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MacLaren's: Robin meets up with Barney, Marshall and NOBODY, and accidentally kicks a shopping bag that's on the floor as she slides into the booth (next to Barney). It's from Gennaro's. Marshall says, "It's just some takeout food I'm bringing home to Lily." Robin mentions that Holly just texted Ted "something about take-out from Gennaro's." Marshall's eyes widen. He looks at Barney who keeps shaking his head no no no no no. When they refuse to meet her eyes, she works it out. "You sons of bitches! You're Holly!" Commercial.

Barney explains to Robin that he and Marshall knew Ted would try to call Holly before three days had passed, so when he grabbed Ted's phone from him, he changed Holly's number to his own work cell phone number. Marshall says the plan was to "bust on" Ted for calling Holly so soon, but instead of calling, Ted started texting her. And we flash back to Marshall and Barney sitting at MacLaren's, reading as Ted sends off his "Texty text." Barney's contemptuous, but Marshall's heart bleeds. "Poor, sweet Ted. We should -- we should tell him it's us." Barney agrees, but then adds, "OR -- we pretend we're Holly and we're in the bath." Marshall quickly says, "Yeah, that's better." We cut to Ted doing the ButtTed, and then back to Barney and Marshall who are cracking up. Marshall again suggests calling Ted and confessing. Barney agrees, then says, "OR -- we tell him our favorite color is red, and we think the cowboy look is very sexy." I like to imagine that Marshall wraps his principles in bubble wrap and asks Carl to stow them behind the bar, anytime he's alone with Barney. Anyhow he agrees, and we cut to Ted wearing his bathrobe and the red cowboy boots. Robin's dozing on the couch, but wakes to catch sight of him as he texts "Holly." We get a snippet of his internal monologue. "I'm wearing them now, and they do look sexy." See? Pulling. Them. Off. We cut to...

MacLaren's: Barney and Marshall laugh and holler once they realize that Ted put on the boots. Marshall tries to be good and suggests it's time they come clean with Ted. And again, Barney agrees, then says, "OR -- we tell him we just took off our shirt." Marshall says, "Yeah, that's better," and starts texting away at poor Ted. Barney suggests "we're wearing a black lace bra underneath." Marshall says, "I don't think we're wearing anything underneath." Barney sighs about how sexy "we" are and then Marshall announces that now, Ted is only wearing the cowboy boots. "It is ON!" Barney dances in his seat like a little kid who just got that pony for Christmas. "It is so on! Okay, okay, tell him that we're -- we're slowing slipping out of our..." Barney's hands trail down his body as his words trail off. And then: "What are we doing?" Marshall ponders this for a moment. "I -- I think that we're... about to have..." he gestures at the phone. "Sex with Ted." His voice cracks on Ted's name. He throws the phone down and we flash forward to...

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How I Met Your Mother

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