How I Met Your Mother

Episode Report Card
Cindy McLennan: C+ | 1 USERS: D
Unleash the Kraken

Station Wagon: Lily can't believe they're kissing and wonders why her plan isn't working. Ted says, "Because they're in love." Lily is convicted of her sins and can't believe she once again interfered in this way. Marshall notes, "It really was just a rough patch." Lily says, "What the hell am I doing? This whole thing was a mistake." The not-a-Storm-Trooper-Robot leans in the window. "So, uh, any of you dudes wanna get high?" The gang gives him a dirty look and we sideways slide to...

MacLaren's: Thicke and the pizza guy sit with Lily, Marshall and Ted -- who is proposing a toast to an absent Barney and Robin. Saget!Ted says, "That was the moment we learned that relationships take hard work -- that eventually, everything will work out." Just then, a re-beautified Robin enters the bar. When Lily asks her where Barney is, Robin pauses. "Uh... we broke up." Saget!Ted interjects: "And that was the moment we unlearned that other lesson we had just learned a few seconds earlier." In flashback, we learn that Barney and Robin never even spotted Ted, Lily, Marshall and their cast of crazies. They just spotted the reflection of their fat(suit)/old selves in the diner window, and admitted they weren't happy. They can't figure out what went wrong until -- while listing their similarities -- Barney says they're both awesome, and Robin speculates, "Maybe there's too much awesome, here." Barney nods. "Exactly. Two awesomes cancel each other out." They decide to break up, but since they still love each other, they don't know how to deal until Robin say, "Maybe this isn't a break-up. Maybe this is two friends getting back together." It's only then that Thicke, Crazy Meg and the rest of Lily's masterpiece come on the scene. Barney and Robin's old argument triggers don't bother them, but they can't stand the chaos, so they escape and kiss for old time's sake, which is what our gang saw on the stake-out. Barney suggests that maybe when Robin turns 40, if she hasn't found anyone... Robin says, "Oh, I already have that deal with Ted." So Barney says, "Right. Stupid." I do not like thinking about Barney and Chris Farley in the same breath, m'kay, Show? Barney doesn't know my crazy trains of thought though, so he adds, "Maybe when you turn 39, if you haven't found anyone..." They laugh and walk out, arm-in-arm, while Saget!Ted narrates, "It turns out that they really did just need to let things run their course."

MacLaren's: Marshall asks Robin how Barney's doing. She says she thinks he's okay. "It might be a while before he fully recovers..." Just then, she, and everyone else at the table shivers. She asks the table if they just felt a chill. They agree and then... A beat. The "Peter Gunn Theme" plays. We see his shoes, first. Shiny, black patent leather. The crease on his trousers could cut butter. The women eye him appreciatively, and with no modesty. Just the way he likes it. The camera pans up his form. He's slender. Lean. Hard. He adjusts his cuffs. He has only one chin. It's BARNEY! Sans fat suit. He straightens his tie and raises his right eyebrow. "Daddy's home." He winks, and we fade to black.

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How I Met Your Mother




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