How I Met Your Mother

Episode Report Card
Cindy McLennan: A- | 1 USERS: A+
I Won't Grow Up

Ted's apartment: Robin and Ted bring home an injured Barney, and Robin tries to talk Barney into giving up, but he's only got one item left on his list -- the beer bong. Ted takes out some old, warm Russian beers he found in his building's basement. Robin makes a "brewski" pun, and then takes one without a thought, but every time Ted gets near Barney with the beer and beer bong, Barney just can't make himself go through with it. He finally tells Ted he wins. "I hate this. I hate all of it. My back is killing me. Everyone at the rave thought I was a narc. My ear hurts so bad I can hear it! I can hear my own ear! Think about that!" Barney pulls at the mesh shirt he's wearing over a tennis ball-colored tank. "My clothes. What is it? What is it? What am I... get this stuff off of me! I'll pay you double for your finest suit." He takes out $30 and tells Ted to throw in the shoes. Hee. I sort of like the mesh shirt on him. NPH has some nice arms, no? Barney swears he'll never again do anything on the Murtaugh list. And defeated, he adds, "I'm too old for this... stuff."

Ted confesses that when he went to bed at 8:00 PM as per his list, he couldn't sleep. Give it a few years and a few kids, honey, and get back to me. Anyhow, he spent the night watching all four Lethal Weapon flicks and realized that although Murtaugh is always complaining that he's too old for this shit, he keeps making movies and doing more shit. This is a lovely grace note for Ted, who usually loves being right. "I guess what I'm saying is... screw being old. Let's go TP Laser Tag, huh?" He then pulls out a big package of toilet paper. Barney yells out the most enthusiastic "YEAH!" he can muster, then adds, "And then? The hospital." And we cut to...

The School Gym; The Big Game: By now, future Ted has future Marshall inserting a Teen Wolf character into his memories of the formidable opposing team. The score, if anyone was keeping track (MARSHALL!), would be about 53 to nothing. Them. One of the little guys asks Marshall what they're doing wrong. Marshall finally responds, "You know what? You're not doing anything wrong. It's great that you guys are losing..." Lily gives him the old hairy eyeball, but Marshall's on a roll. "...because in life, it doesn't matter how much effort you put in, or how hard you try. People will just give you things like diplomas and jobs and promotions. So, it doesn't matter what you do out there, as long as... as long as you have fun." In order to avoid arguing in front of the children, Lily and Marshall then have a telepathic exchange, in which he tells her he can't take it anymore, and asks for permission to do it his way. Lily says that's fine, but she's doing it her way too, and she's bringing out the guitar. And of course Saget!Ted frames his narration as if we're going to learn that makes all the difference, but it doesn't. The team ends up losing something like 118 to nothing. There should be a slaughter rule. There would be, if they actually kept score. But then the show tries to tell us Lily was right. I'm fine with Marshall being grateful to receive a participation trophy, and even with him saying, "Maybe your way isn't totally stupid," but when Lily replies, "Thanks, your way is totally stupid," they lose me. Don't get me wrong, Marshall was way out of line throughout, but Lily was ridiculous throughout. I would have at least liked Lily to nod at Marshall's point that when this philosophy is taken too far, it can teach kids an unearned sense of entitlement. Let's go to commercial so I don't break into a rant, because this was an enjoyable episode, and maybe the writers were just trying to avoid belaboring the point at the expense of a laugh.

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How I Met Your Mother




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