High School Reunion
Episode 3

Episode Report Card
Wendola: C | Grade It Now!
Naked Oak Park!

The Chick Cruise returns to shore, and the women classmates walk back to the house. Summer returns to her room and finds an envelope on her bed. "Open it!" says Holly. It's a plain white card that says, "Of all the seasons of the year, my favorite is Summer…" You know, when you really think about it, the note isn't really saying all that much. I mean, pretty much all you can say in response is, "Uh…yeah. Dig that crazy CALENDAR." ["Plus, how many times must she have heard variations on that creaky line by this point in her life?" -- Sars] But Holly and Natasha start squealing that Summer's got a love note, and Summer says that it looks like Maurice's handwriting. Or Tim's. "But neither of them would do that," she says. Maya says she hopes it's not a joke. "I've got a feeling I'm going to be really really freaked out. We'll see," says Summer.

Hooting and cheering, the guys bring in the dead marlin. Assorted reaction shots from the girls: Ooh! It's so big! So long! Nicole looks like she maybe wants to date it. The guys have a great time flinging the fish on the floor and hearing it thud. Give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day; give a bunch of men a really huge fucking fish and they'll be annoying for at least three hours. Now it's time for the women to be impressed with Ben. They want to see Ben's blistered hands. Cut to various interview clips from the girls. Natasha: "Ooh! Ben!" Amy: "Ahh! Ben!" Maya: "Wow, Ben."

Dan Barbato is trolling around the upstairs of the house -- oh, I mean, "strolling" -- when he comes across a Hall Pass on Dave's bed. He brings it down to Dave, who's up to his elbows in fish. I won't make a crude joke here if Dave won't, okay? Good. Dave knows right away that he'll ask Holly. He goes into her room and asks her. Holly says she'll go if he takes ten million showers to get the fish guts off. Ooh, good call, Holly. I'd have started with telling him to take off the mirrored sunglasses and stupid hat that he's wearing indoors at night, but maybe he'll remember to take those off when he showers anyway. Dave goes down the hall and brags to Dan Barbato, who's wearing only a towel. Look, I know you people really dig the "Man Boobatos" nickname, but to be honest, I have nothing against a guy with a nice rack. In fact, I think that whenever Dan is filmed, the camera should linger on them and then pan up to his face, just like in all of Holly's bikini shots. I think it's only fair to the ladies.

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High School Reunion




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