Gilmore Girls
The Lorelais' First Day At Chilton

Episode Report Card
The Lorelais' First Day At Chilton

I don't care how snotty the new school is, you generally don't get a smackdown like that on the first day. I moved an awful lot and was usually the new smart kid. The other smart kids just ignore you, hoping that if you don't meet anyone you can't borrow any notes and therefore you aren't going to do very well. They don't work by intimidation -- they work by isolation. If you think you're hated, you generally start to falter in school. This kind of attack tactic is reserved for '80s teen movies where someone just hates the movie's hero for no real reason. Like Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.

Sookie goes through an elaborate peach-testing process as the fruit deliverer tells her that they're fine. Lorelai shows up in her suit and recaps the first half-hour about her cowgirl outfit. Michel shows up and announces that there's a phone call for Lorelai, adding "And if I have to fetch you like a dog I'd like a cookie and a raise." Lorelai leaves to take the call.

A group of elderly women stop Michel and kindly ask him if he knows where they could find the best antiques. "At your house, I'd guess," he replies, and walks off before they can, "Well, I never!"

Lorelai finds Emily waiting for her on the phone. She tries to talk to her but has to stop because the harp is too loud. She asks Alex Borstein (who now has a name -- Drella) if she'll "take it down a notch." Emily tells Lorelai that she just bought Rory a parking space. Lorelai says that Rory doesn't have a car. Emily says that Rory does have a birthday coming up. Lorelai interrupts Emily again to ask Drella to turn the harp-playing down. "Hey, do I look like I have 'Panasonic' stamped on my ass?" Drella shouts. Lorelai says that Rory doesn't need a car. Emily says she'll need it to get to school. Lorelai says Rory will take the bus. "Drug dealers take the bus," Emily says. I look outside my apartment window at the bus stop. Damn. Abandoned again. Lorelai gets off the phone. Drella plucks the strings pluckily. Smirk. Smirk.

Ryan Phillippe II, who I'll just call Philllipppe, walks down the hall calling Rory "Mary." She says her name is Rory. He offers his notes for their class if she needs them. "Really? That'd be great." "Yeah? How great?" Philllipppe starts moving in on Rory, pushing her up against the locker as she stammers. He offers to help her study. She says she views studying as something she'd do alone. He smiles and says, "Bye, Mary." "It's Rory!" she calls out.

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Gilmore Girls




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