Gilmore Girls
Love And War And Snow

Episode Report Card
Pamie: B+ | 2 USERS: A+
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Love And War And Snow

Rory and Lane walk down the street. Rory is searching through a book as she walks. Lane says that she's known Rich since the fifth grade but suddenly he's different. He's not gangly anymore. She asks Rory if she remembers how gangly he was. "I'm sorry, what?" is Rory's reply. Lane tells Rory that she's not paying attention. Rory says she couldn't find her bookmark. She finds it and tells Lane to continue. Lane then lays down the problems inherent in "the whole Blumenfeld/Kim situation." Rory offers that hyphenation would be a problem. Lane says that he's also her band partner, so romance "would be completely awkward." Wait, I thought that was why they had band -- so you guys could all be together in your awkwardness and make weird band love. ["It was when I was in band. I had three best band friends and over the years all three of them, in sequence, went out with this one guy, James. Very incestuous." -- Wing Chun] Hey, I'm allowed to joke. I was president of the chess club, okay? Latin club, two years. Drama. Yearbook. I made weird geek love all over the place. But I stayed away from that band thing, man. I've seen what band love can do. It changes you. Permanently. Lane continues her problems (Sorry, Lane. Didn't mean to pull a Rory on you, there), and says that Rich has never even looked at her like she's a girl "or anything resembling one." And there's no way she's going to be able to convince her parents that he's Korean: "But, I can't help it. I'm obsessed. Did I tell you about his hair?" Before Lane can continue gushing, CuteDean pops his head in between the two of them and gives Rory the whispered, "Hi." Rory is instantly beaming. "Lane." "Dean," the two of them Newman to each other. CuteDean wins the battle with, "Nice hat." CuteDean sits beside Rory and returns her book. She asks how he liked it. He says he could tell her but then he'd have to kill her. Rory smiles (Dude, I've already typed the word "smiles" in there seven times. I even changed one once. This is a smiley show) and gloats that she knew CuteDean would like Jane Austen if she gave it to him. She turns to Lane to tell her that CuteDean likes Jane Austen. "Wow. Who'd have thought," Lane mumbles. Rory looks forward and says, "I told him he would, but he was all, 'Forget Jane Austen. You have to read Hunter Thompson.'" CuteDean insists that Rory does need to read Hunter Thompson. ["No, she doesn't." -- Wing Chun] Rory retorts, "Not as much as you needed to read Jane Austen." Cut to miserable, slouchy Lane who's like, "Hi. Still here. Wearing the big hat. Miserable!" CuteDean takes the bag of cookies. "Wow. She brings me cookies. How can I repay her?" Rory says, "How about a little Charlotte Brontë?" ["Emily, yes. Charlotte, no." -- Wing Chun] ["Charlotte." -- Pamie] "How 'bout something else?" CuteDean replies. He leans in and kisses her. Cut to Lane trying not to look. "That's good, too!" Rory says after the kiss. Oh, God, that was so cute. So cute! I'm covered in cute. My cat just walked over to me, put his paw on my lap and said, "Hey, I'm still cute, too, right? I mean, I have large cuteness levels, right?" I hug my cat and overcute. I sprout freckles. Lane excuses herself and mopes away. Rory and CuteDean go back to their book.

St. Clare I, the patron saint of television, steps down from her podium on my table and walks over to my laptop. She puts a tiny hand on mine. "Can I talk to you for a second?" I move over the mugs of hot chocolate and clear her a space. "I just...don't you miss St. Clare II?" she asks me.

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Gilmore Girls

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