Game of Thrones
The Prince of Winterfell

Episode Report Card
Monty Ashley: B | 9 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
Your Dragons Are Not Your Babies

Robb tells her he doesn't want to marry "the Frey girl." Talisa doesn't want him to either, adding, "But you needed that bridge. I hope it's a very beautiful bridge." They kiss. And start taking off each other's clothes. It's a surprisingly quick process, although you will not be surprised to learn that she's naked before he is. Then they're on the ground. And his pants stay on. You know, these tents don't have locking doors, so I don't think it's a great idea for him to be having sex with someone who he's not engaged to.

Away to Arya and Hot Pie. And Gendry. I guess. Gendry is the more important character since he's Robert Baratheon's bastard, but Hot Pie's more fun. Hot Pie is talking about hot pies, which is the sort of thing you'd think he'd want to avoid. Like, when they were dragged into Harrenhal, he had a chance to say his name was "Johnny Armageddon" or something cool, but as far as we know, he's still stuck with the name "Hot Pie." Arya says they have to trust the plan, which just consists of "walk through the gate." It seems risky, since there are guards everywhere. After some disagreement, they do. Some guards are on the stairs, but they don't seem to be moving. In fact, there are several corpses around the place, which is probably going to cause some comment later. And I have to think the Mountain is going to get in trouble for letting half the guards die the night after Tywin left. Arya, Hot Pie and Gendry get out. They're free!

A siege catapult is prepared on a boat, which I'm not sure is the most stable platform for that. So that means we're in Stannis's fleet, which explains why Stannis and Davos are here. They're talking about the weather, which isn't just small talk for their situation. If the weather holds, they'll be at King's Landing soon. Like maybe next episode. Just throwing that out there. Stannis admires Davos for taking the insult "Onion Knight" and making it his sigil. He's even got an onion on his flag! Davos says his son wants to change the flag to something more traditional, like three mermen with tridents or something. He says he understands why the older families look down on him. His father was a crabber and sons of lords don't like to break bread with crabbers' sons. Stannis says that Robert and Ned got all the glory of overthrowing the Mad King Targaryen while Stannis held Storm's End with 500 men. And then after the coup, Robert gave Storm's End to Renly, who never fought anybody. Stannis seems pretty bitter about this. Stannis describes the siege of Storm's End. They ate the horses, then the cats, then the dogs and then the rats. His wife was dying. And then Davos (who you'll remember was a smuggler) slipped through the lines with his onions. And possibly some salted beef. Stannis says that every man wanted to kiss him. Davos deadpans, "I was relieved they did not." Stannis explains that he's always done his duty, whether it was to hold Storm's End or give it up. But now he's the legal king and he's going to make Davos the Hand. Interesting choice. I would have guessed he'd name Melisandre, but I guess he could take her advice anyway.

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Game of Thrones

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