Gone Native

Episode Report Card
Kim: A+ | Grade It Now!
Gone Native

Since it's been over a month since the last new episode, the opening once again features Billie reminding us that Van and Deaqon are undercover cops who aren't allowed to drop cover or flash a badge (which would be the definition of undercover, no?). Van says that he lies for a living. Deaqon says that his job is to catch the bad guys. Billie tells the boys that this job is "not all about tail and Tanqueray." Then Van and Deaqon bicker to let you know that although they are partners, they don't always get along. The party was not off the hook this week, I am sad to report.

Van and Deaqon meet up in the desert somewhere. I've decided to modify Aaron's episode grading scheme for this show, which means that from now on, I will base my episode grade on the Start to Shirtless Facinelli count. But since I'm not as fastidious as Aaron, instead of giving the number of seconds, I'll just base it on the act in which the Shirtless Facinelli occurs. And it occurs now, in the teaser, as Van changes his shirt for no apparent reason. Deaqon has grown a beard and looks a lot like Will Smith. Deaqon teaches Van how to say "bottoms up" in Russian, since they are meeting up with some Russians -- a brother and sister duo, in fact. By their familiar greetings, it's clear that the boys have met the Russians previously. Katiya, the sister, asks who wants to kill some police, and Van and Deaqon raise their hands.

Cut to one week earlier, when Billie was giving the boys the background on the Russians. Dimitri, the brother, was formerly in the Russian Mob. Katiya was heavily involved in the Moscow black market. They immigrated to the United States and got involved in arms dealing. Billie says that they have enough information to arrest Dimitri and Katiya right now, but they really want their supplier, Nikolai. Billie displays a mug shot of Nikolai, adding that Nikolai only trusts Dimitri. According to Interpol, Nikolai is putting a new weapon on the market. No one knows what it is, but four terrorist organizations have bid on it. Interpol? Why is the LAPD handling this case? Doesn't it seem more like it should be in the federal jurisdiction, what with the importing weapons across national boundaries and all? I mean, LAPD could help if the weapons were purchased in L.A., but it just seems weird that Van and Deaq are handling the whole investigation. Deaqon figures out that they need to get close to the Russians, so that they are allowed to meet Nikolai, and then they arrest him.

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