Everwood
Complex Guilt

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Complex Guilt

Bright's workplace, yay! Ephram is in the break room with him. He asks Bright what he does all day. Bright points to some pamphlets on the wall. "See those? I filed 'em. And when the receipts come in from the printer? I file those too." Aw. Ephram says he senses a trend. Bright says he's glad for his 30-minute break, when he gets to talk to his co-workers about how their filing's going. Bright cuts himself an enormous slice of cake, and asks Ephram what his problem is. Ephram says he just can't get through to Amy, no matter what he does. Bright says that Ephram needs some "face time" with Amy, and that will solve the whole problem. Ephram laments that he can't even get an appointment with the girl. Bright has a plan, though -- Ephram will come over for dinner as Bright's guest, charm Amy and the parents, and she'll "be melting by Jell-O." Hee. Ephram says he can do that. Bright: "You missed me, didn't you?"

Cut to Edna and Irv's. Edna is dragging Irv downstairs while Irv grouses around about what the hell is going on. Edna tells him it's called a surprise, and to cool it. When they get downstairs, Edna tells her husband that she knows she threw a wrench in his retirement plan, and that he had his heart set on going to the ends of the earth to find the perfect place to write. "So…I brought the perfect place to write…to Everwood!" Edna throws open a door, and Irv is confronted with a beautiful tropical-themed office, all dark wood and palm trees. "What the devil?" he asks. Edna says it's not overlooking the Med, she knows, but she could whip up some hummus and pita bread. Irv wanders around the office, speechless, but in sort of a bad way. He asks Edna how she could afford all this. Edna says she dipped into her savings; that's what it's there for. Irv smiles, finally, and thanks Edna. Edna sits him down, and orders him to crank out that Great American Novel he's been storing up. She leaves the room with a big grin, and Irv opens his laptop a little too sadly.

Abbott House of Disastrous Dinners. Patch tells Rose that everything is wonderful. Bright agrees, and gives Ephram a meaningful look. Flash to Amy, who is absolutely seething with rage. Hee. Ephram offers stupidly, "Uh, excellent bird, Mrs. Abbott." Rose thanks Ephram, and adds that she would have made more if she'd known he were coming. Bright says that's his fault. Amy: "Kinda rude." Rose also thanks Ephram for bringing the delicious potato salad. Ephram says he knows Amy loves it, and asks her directly, "It's your favorite side dish, right?" Amy responds, "With SANDWICHES." The table goes silent. Awkward. Patch starts talking about the school play, and Rose says she needs to remember to get tickets for her parents. Amy tells her not to bother, because she's not in the play this year. Rose asks why not. Amy says she didn't audition, then looks pointedly at Ephram. "I got a little consumed." Ephram takes the bait, and says that Amy could probably still get a part, like "a swan or something." Oh, Ephram. Amy says it's not Swan Lake. Ephram says he thought all ballets had swans. Amy: "Probably because you're too busy seeing all the rock concerts out there." Bright channels us all by telling Amy to get over it already, that is was all his idea for Ephram to go see Madison play anyway. Patch is all, "Madison? You saw Madison?" Ephram echoes Bright, "Yeah, it was his idea." Amy brats, "That doesn't make it better, EPHRAM." Ephram: "Seriously?" Heeee. Amy says no, because that just tells her that it was a pre-meditated bad decision rather than a spontaneous one. Bright tells Amy to quit being such a chick, then they get into the traditional sibling "shut up; no, you shut up" fight. Ephram tells Amy he's trying to make an effort. Amy tells him to go make an effort with Madison, and flees the table. Patch calls, "There's certainly no reason for him to do that." Heh.

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Everwood

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