Where There's Smoke

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Heathen: B- | Grade It Now!
Where There's Smoke

Previously on ER: Sandy Lopez had a baby; her mom seemed lightly disapproving of Kerry's hours. Neela -- on the same day Susan declared she wouldn't make a good ER doc and Carter urged her to be more assertive -- accidentally pushed Demerol that conflicted with a patient's anti-depressants, which killed him. Gallant took the blame.

We fade up on a gurgling baby, unintelligibly goo-gooing his way through the scene and yet still acting rings around Mischa Barton. Sandy comes out of the bathroom in a bra, holding a breast pump and announcing that she squeezed out nine ounces. Out of those Milk Duds? Right. Sandy slinks up behind Kerry, wraps her arm around Kerry's waist, and purrs, "Can't say I don't produce." Weaver thinks fondly back to the night before and is inclined to agree. The doorbell rings; it's Sandy's mother. "Better put on your shirt -- she already thinks we're pervs," Kerry half-jokes. She picks up baby Henry and coos her way to the front door. "Sorry," Florina says, entering. "My battery was dead." She reaches for Henry, but Weaver leans back and cautions, "Hands, hands...." I have no problem with this -- sure, Florina's a mother herself, but when you're dealing with someone else's kid, you abide by their rules, and there's certainly nothing wrong with asking for a protective hygenic measure. Florina seems a bit put-out, though, because she's The Evil Mother-In-Law. Florina babbles about her car, and there's some banter with Sandy about her angelic brother, but we don't really care because we never see Sandy, and if the show's not invested in her the why should we be? Kerry hands over Henry with some instructions, and Florina turns the kid toward Sandy and coos, "Say goodbye to Mama." Sandy kisses Henry. "And Mommy, too," Sandy prods Florina. Florina turns toward Kerry somewhat less enthusiastically and parrots, "Say goodbye," notably omitting the nickname. Sandy shoots Kerry a knowing look of regret, and they both grab their stuff to leave. Henry wails. He knows his mother's not on contract. "It's all right, we'll be back," Sandy calls out tenderly. Let's see: Sporadic appearances plus only one other episode this season, divided by the ER jinx and multiplied by the number of typewriter monkeys...yep, that equals death.

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