The Advocate

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Heathen: B- | Grade It Now!
The Advocate

J: Right...Look, it's not a problem. I mean, if there's ever anything on Dawson's Creek about chicken feet or cotton balls, I know I can come to you for help....Hey, do you think this is a shout-out? It's got to be a shout-out!
H: But that's not fair! I'm the one shouting! That's not right. I think it's the opposite of a shout-out.
J:It's a fuck-you.
H: Well. They can take their middle fingers and shove 'em in their...
J: ...Toes.

Somewhere during the wreckage of this scene, Crazy Toe Girl says, "You're the doctor. You know best." And Luka stares at her, or I presume he does; I am ducking so that my laptop blocks the television and all I can do is listen. "You lie," Luka voices over. "Say the same things to different people over and over again until you can hardly make the words come out of your mouth any more. It's hard not to be disgusted at yourself, with the system..." Oh, and according to Lauren, at some point CTG started screaming for her mother, and her mother took her hand, signaling that at least on this level, they're still mother and daughter and her child's pain was more important than Mama CTG's hatred for her kid. It's all very sweet, I'm sure, yet impossible for me to watch, what with the tomfoolery and the knives.

Abby calls out to Elizabeth, "We have a gastric rupture!" Mercifully, beautifully, Elizabeth enters Trauma Yellow and rescues me from my green-tiled chamber of sensory assault. In this moment, she becomes my favorite character in the world. Weaver blames Keith's condition again on the overbagging; Susan contends that he might've had an underlying lesion. Regardless, his pressure's not coming up. Susan is glaring at Kerry and imagining her fiery demise a hundred different ways. "He's allergic to penicillin," she informs Elizabeth, still angry. Elizabeth asks if there's any family. Susan shrugs. "Kerry? Any family?" she asks. Weaver blows this off. "Ask Frank," she says. We fade to black realizing that we can barely focus on what this scene meant because we are still severely grossed out from the other atrocities, and that TPTB should be locked up for all these crimes against viewers -- namely, that one particular viewer lost her ability to view.

When we return, Luka is cleaning up the area around Crazy Toe Girl's foot. He tells her she can go home as long as the bleeding doesn't begin again. Bitterly, CTG spits that her mother would probably like to see her go blind. Luka bristles and tries to argue that CTG's mother secretly cares about her. CTG insists that she doesn't. "What I saw was a scared little girl crying for her mother, and her mother came," Luka oversimplifies. I also saw a whacked-out brat kicking props at her mother, and her mother ran, so I guess there's two sides to every crazy toe. "She'd never let me come home," avers CTG. "Ask her," Luka prods. CTG stares up at him and blinks her toe beseechingly. "Would you?" she asks. Luka stares off into the distance, because he's disturbed and distant, and also they didn't write anything else for him to say.

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