Episode Report Card
Heathen: C+ | 1 USERS: A+

Interestingly, a wound on Luka's left cheek is trickling blood. We learn later that this particular wound came earlier in the day, and I can't figure out why it would've reopened if most of the damage to Luka's face from this accident happened on the other side of his head. I don't buy that he smacked the top right of his skull and reinjured his left cheek, yet all the precious facial features in between the two remained unsmashed and even unsullied. Just a thought.

Erin's machinery is beeping wildly, so that we know she's in the throes of what I like to call Deep Shit. Susan screams for a backboard and Romano yells that he's going to free up an OR for her. Gallant stares at Erin, scared, until Weaver gives him a task. Then he looks up and gazes right at Luka, all wounded and sad that his crush has gotten, well, crushed. Luka glumly watches them hold down Erin's head and apply a neck brace. "She was walking on the scene," he whispers. Right on cue, everyone stops what he or she is doing to stare at Luka, just so we're clear that this is all too shocking. This lasts for a full beat pause until Erin's machinery is like, "Hello? This is my scene," and Erin practically sits up and says, "Excuse me, can some of you help me not die?" They jump back to work. Gallant yanks Luka back a few feet. "You might contaminate the field," he says harshly. The din of the doctors fades as we focus on Luka, though we faintly hear them diagnose a possible liver laceration. "Dr. Kovac, what happened?" Gallant asks.

This begins the cycle backwards in time, with each segment delineated by a flash-bulb noise and a bright-white effect on the screen. After the flash, we see a spraying fire hydrant and a messy, windblown pile of what looks like newspapers or those free apartment-hunter flyers. Luka's Dodge Penis has crashed. He is conscious, as is Erin, his passenger. "You okay? You hit your head?" he asks. "No, my side," she winces. "Back pain?" he asks. She doesn't answer and seems a little dazed in trying to jiggle her door open. It won't budge. Luka hands her his mobile phone and tells her to call 911 while he checks on the other car. "We hit someone?" she asks, confused.

Luka tumbles out of the car and falls flat on his pretty face. Unfortunately, it's true: Falling is always funny. Although Luka gets credit for looking sexy even when he's flailing and face-planting into a pile of trash. Really eerie music plays as Luka stares at a wailing old homeless man in a black cloak pushing a cart and carrying a giant candy cane. People have speculated that this man is The Grim Hobo Reaper. I contend that candy can't be used either for evil or by Evil. Luka shakes off this idiotic moment and trots to the other car. "Stay still," he calls out. The driver complains that his elbow and leg hurt, and his son moans loudly in the passenger seat. "It was the other guy's fault," rails the dad. "He was driving like a maniac!" Uncomfortably, Luka ignores this and deduces that the man's hip is dislocated. Then he moves around to the other side of the car and checks on the kid, Dwayne. "It hurts," Dwayne whimpers. He's having trouble breathing, which Luka realizes is due to a fractured collarbone that's compressing his windpipe. The father desperately begs for help. "I'll be right back," Luka shouts. "Don't leave us here!" screams the man.

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