All In The Family

Episode Report Card
19 USERS: A+
All In The Family

Props, for one damn time, to the writers, to the cast, and to Thomas Edison [Sars: RIGHT?] for inventing the television. Further props to humblepie and Kim. Mad props to my girl Sars, who was there on the other end of the Not! Line to talk me down from my roof during the commercials.

Previously on ER: Lucy treated a patient named Paul Sobriki, who showed up with a bad headache. As part of her treatment, she tapped Paul's spine while Carter held him still; Paul really didn't take it so well. Carter blew off his supervisory duties and wasn't adequately attentive when Lucy told him she thought Paul might be schizophrenic. Finally, Carter noticed that Lucy hadn't attended to a leg laceration as he'd asked her to do; when he went looking for her in Paul's room, Paul stole up behind Carter and stabbed him in the kidney. Carter fell on the floor, trying (and failing) to call for help, and saw Lucy staring back at him, gasping ineffectually for breath, having had her throat slit.

Kerry "Nation" Weaver crutches through the ambulance bay toward the hospital. An ambulance pulls out, and a paramedic leans out the window to yell at her to hurry up, or she'll miss the party. She pretty much ignores him, and runs into Cleo "Patra 2525" Finch coming out from the ER. Weaver asks Finch if she's off; Finch replies that Luka gave her fifteen minutes to pick up her dry cleaning before the shop closes. Weaver pointedly asks, "We're slow, I take it?" "We are now," Finch calls back, already on her way. Weaver yells after her, "What's that music?"

Before we can hear Finch's response (if any), we're inside, where the Valentine's Day party is still going on, and the stereo is, admittedly, on pretty loud. The revellers...revel, and Malik holds his hand out to Carol "Don't Mess With a Missionary, Man" Hathaway and Luka "On a Wing and a...Well, That's All, Actually" Kovac in the manner of a newly engaged woman showing off a diamond ring. It seems that Malik got a manicure on the assumption that "that's what the ladies like," and that women check out men's hands before any other body part. "I check out the butt, myself," Lydia remarks. Malik holds his hand out to Lydia, turns it palm up, then palm down, and mutters, "You know what I'm sayin'?" Pfft. Conni's with me, and says, "Oh, that's a myth -- I tested it." Luka asks, "Tested what?" and Carol says, "It's so not worth explaining." For once, we agree. Luka and Carol notice that Weaver has appeared in the doorway, and Luka calls out his Valentine's wishes. Instead of leaping into his lap at that invitation, as nearly anyone else would, Weaver passive-aggressively yells back, "Isn't it a little loud?" Malik apologizes, and lowers the volume on the stereo a tiny bit. "Dr." Dave Malucci, dancing with Randi, protests, and then sees Weaver in the door and shuts up; Randi lets go Dr. Dave's hands and scurries off. Behind the desk, Weaver opines that "someone went a little overboard with the hearts." Amira, eating some blue cake, asks what's wrong with the hearts, and Weaver says that nothing's wrong with them, turns down an offer of pizza from Chuny (mmm...Chicago piiiiiiizzaaaaaaa), and asks whether Mark isn't still on. Carol, passing through, chirps, "He left at eight -- double date." Dr. Dave drawls, "I'm on 'til nine -- mighty fine." Carol turns back long enough to look disgusted, and keeps going. As Weaver starts to doff her winter gear, Luka explains to her that things slowed down; there's no one waiting to be seen, and he took over the board. Weaver loudly tells everyone they can continue the party for five more minutes, and then go back to work.

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