Ed
Power Of The Person

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Uncle Bob: A | Grade It Now!
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Power Of The Person

Warren goes to see Rev. Isaac again. Isaac recognizes him as the "agitated kid." Warren still doesn't know which religion he's going to pick, but he's pretty impressed with Rev. Isaac. He says he's a lot like the Crossing Over guy. Warren says that he spent all of high school chasing after Jessica Martel, and then had that night with Carrie the college girl who could have passed for his grandmother, when he almost banged her with reckless abandon. He thinks that his relationship with Diane is terrible. Isaac asks if that's because this relationship with Diane may actually work out. Warren says that he's nervous around her all of a sudden, and that even though Isaac may not have detected it, Warren's normally as cool as Clint Eastwood. Isaac asks Warren whether he's kissed Diane yet; Warren says no. Isaac says that's because this time, it's different. Before, with the other girls, it was his hormones that wanted to make out with Carrie and Jessica. But this time it sounds like the affection is coming from Warren's broken shell of a heart. Warren wants to know what he should do. Isaac says he should kiss Diane. My heart melted when I heard those words. You know your Uncle Bob is usually the pinnacle of macho, but man, I melted like an ice cream sandwich in the microwave when I heard someone other than MegaMark step up to the plate and tell Warren to do the right thing.

At the Quizbowl, Letterman's announcer Alan Kalter is playing the host. For those Ed fans whose memory banks haven't been totally obliviated by the demon alcohol like me, you'll remember that last season he played the school principal; this year, he's the host of Quizbowl. I guess that's a promotion. I'm not sure. Gary's on the team; he gives the camera a thumbs-up and mouths the words, "I can hook you up!" when it pans over to him. Ed sees Jackass standing near the audience bleachers, and walks over to him to tell him he did a good thing, letting Gary give the team a shot. Jackass says we'll see how it all turns out. Jackass tells Ed that he and Carol are moving in together. Ed asks whether that's why Jackass is stressed and started drinking. Jackass tells Ed that he started drinking because he passed a liquor store. He must be a Baptist. Anyway, when it comes to scotch, Jackass is admittedly sitting on a pair of threes. Meanwhile, Kalter is asking the kids the state capitols. He says "Kansas," and finally Gary shakes off his drug-induced haze to blurt, "Kansas City." It's actually Topeka. I can sympathize with Gary, because I wasn't even aware that Kansas was still a state. I thought they turned it into a giant rest stop or something.

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