Home Is Where The Ducks Are

Episode Report Card
Uncle Bob: D | 1 USERS: A+
Everything's Ducky In Stuckeyville

Previously on Ed...Carol broke up with Nick. That's it. We're on our sixth hour of Ed, and the only plot line that NBC feels is worth mentioning is that Carol broke up with Nick. I understand that this is the main theme of the show right now...Ed's love interest is now available and ripe for the pickin'. Everything else pales in comparison to this plot. Even Molly's rapid weight gain is left behind collecting dust when it comes to the saga of Nick and Carol.

Inside the bowling alley, a crowd has gathered around the front desk as America's sweetheart, Phil Stubbs, hops up on the counter and blows an air horn to get everyone's attention. He indulges us with his usual smarmy patter and then introduces his boss and CEO of Stuckey Bowl, Mr. Edmund Stevens, to a thunderous round of applause. If, in fact, twenty people can create an applause level worthy of being deemed "thunderous." Ed thanks the crowd for the smattering of applause and corrects Phil on his actual name. It's Edward, not Edmund. Phil "raises the roof" and says, "Woo! Testify!!"

...I need a Phil t-shirt, NBC. I want Phil's mug on the front with the words "Woo! Testify!!" emblazoned across the bottom. I shall wear this t-shirt to every social function that I have the fortune of being invited to, and I will spread the gospel of Edaccordingly. And believe me...when you're the sexiest man in the world, you get invited to quite a few shindigs, guys. Whip me up a t-shirt with Phil on it, and I guarantee you, you'll have a top-ten show inside a month.

Oh yeah...you guys want an actual recap of the show...my apologies...

Anyhoo...Ed then thanks the crowd on hand and welcomes everyone to the annual Bowling Tournament. He then introduces Mayor Wally Kendricks, played by veteran character actor M. Emmet Walsh, who, to America's shock and dismay, is still alive and kicking. Mayor Kendricks begins his complimentary spiel on the upcoming Election Day, but the hungry crowd wants none of that...they're here to BOWL, baby!! The mayor realizes he has a potential riot of bowlers on his hands, drops the speech like a deformed blind date, and pulls out his gun to shoot, thus officially opening the tournament festivities. The gun doesn't go off. The mayor fiddles with it a bit and goes to shoot it again. Nothing. Phil compensates for the mayor's ineptitude by hollering "KABLAMMO!!!" and the tournament of bowling commences.

Ed and the mayor walk away from the throng of hungry bowling-shoe renters, and Ed thanks him for stopping by to help kick off the tournament. The mayor tells him to think nothing of it -- emceeing half-assed bowl-a-thons is one of his duties. Ed corrects him by reminding him that this bowl-a-thon is full assed.

The mayor asks for Ed's help in a legal matter. Ed's intrigued and is instructed to meet with the mayor in the mayor's office the following day. Phil sums up the entire two minutes of the show so far by ribbing Ed with, "I never thought I'd see the day when Ed Stevens was working for the man," marking Phil's lame line of the night extremely early on. The credits then roll, followed by commercials for many consumer-oriented products.

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