The Devil’s Waltz

Episode Report Card
Sobell: B+ | 23 USERS: A-
Dracula, Staunch Abolitionist

Mina is sleeping in her room and Grayson is busy watching her in a corner, because I guess we’ve all accepted “Vampire creepily watching a young woman sleep” as a thing that is totally normal behavior. (THANKS SO MUCH, TWILIGHT). When Mina comes to, instead shrieking like a banshee at her fiancé's boss just hanging out in the bedchamber like it’s no thing, she sleepily says, "What are you doing here?"

Grayson is all, "I know I shouldn’t be here, but there’s no time." When Mina’s all, "Time for what?" we find out the answer is "Time for unpleasant truths." As Grayson correctly points out that Mina is making a mistake, Harker will never make her happy, and she knows this yet persists in going through with this farce of a marriage. Then the two of them make out.

Of course, this is all a dream, as we find out when Lucy walks in on the middle of the action and opens the windows like it’s no big deal, and Grayson abruptly disappears. Lucy tut-tuts about all the stuff they’ve got to get done before tonight’s shindig and Mina says sadly, "Oh, it’s still on?" "Unless you’ve reconsidered?" Lucy asks in a voice that promises madcap continental tours, a Boston Marriage and a happy senescence spent throwing lot of shade at Getrude Stein and Alice B. Toklas. Mina sighs that she has not reconsidered. Lucy rallies heroically. I have to say, I like Lucy more and more with each episode. She’s showing a lot of courage and selflessness in her own way, and it’s a darned shame her love for Mina will probably ruin her.

Meanwhile, Grayson and Van Helsing are doing Science!(TM) in Grayson’s green underground science lair. (It is way too rococo and steam punk-by-way-of-Emerald-City to be a mere laboratory). Anyway, we find out that today’s experiment will somehow involve a half-dressed lady vampire, and it’s all with the aim of letting Alex gavotte in the sun. "People are getting suspicious, you understand?" he hisses at Van Helsing, who looks like he’s just adopted the honey badger as a spirit animal and therefore no longer cares. Grayson then asks where Renfield was, as he was supposed to accompany the lab equipment. Van Helsing shrugs, "He was nowhere to be found. I had to do it myself." Alex looks troubled.

Speaking of Renfield, he’s just come to. Scary Poppins monologues, because while she may have a vast array of torture devices on her table, "originality" and "the ability to keep her mouth shut" are not among them. So she natters, "Mr. Renfield. We are about to embark upon a journey, you and I. It begins with a single question, and it ends with your answer to that question. I want you to remember that, so I will say it again: It ends with your answer. So you see, no matter how helpless you may feel, no matter how lengthy, debasing and disagreeable the journey may prove, ultimately, you are in control."

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