Dracula
Servant to Two Masters

Episode Report Card
Sobell: B- | 22 USERS: B
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Dracula, Having an Epically Bad Day

Welcome back, everyone. According to the previouslies: Dracula’s still hung up on following the sun; Harker is being batted about by anyone who can outthink him (so, all of London then); the Order Draco is fond of making threats; the best vampire hunter the Order Draco has is somehow oblivious to the vampire temporarily living in her underpants; Lucy is a lesbian, but she has terrible taste in crush objects because – like seemingly everyone else on this show – she’s pining for the slack-jawed Mina Murray.

So let’s get into this episode. Grayson Energy Company is busy making things light up in an appropriately science-y fashion and Alex is busy ignoring his appetite in favor of tweaking machinery. Van Helsing is all, “This is no time to go on a diet!” and Alex tells him to cram it. Some showy Science then commences and long story short, Alex has basically invented clean renewable energy. He smugs it up around Van Helsing, whose entire attitude can be summed up as, “Yes, but will unshackling civilization from the bonds of fossil fuels actually wipe out the hateful Mr. Browning?”

Meanwhile, Harker looks at his ticket for A Doll’s House and broods while he waits for his boss to come in. When Alex finally does, Harker blurts out, “General Shaw is innocent. He never took bribes to promote war.” Alex innocently says, “But your informant –“ and Harker sulks about how his informant was a paid actress. (And also, a light evening snack for Alex, but that’s unlikely to come up.) Harker gropes his way toward dim comprehension: Whomever did this had to have resources and forethought, and stand to benefit – wait a minute, it’s coming … “It was you!” Harker says, and Alex says heartily, “Don’t be absurd! Was I not the one that told you explicitly to drop the whole business?” Harker’s all, “But you knew I couldn’t resist!” then adds dazedly, “What have you done?” Alex shrugs that they did what was necessary, and after Harker continues mewling about how awful Alex is, Alex acidly points out to Harker, “You were the one who sought out the bookkeeper. You were the one who sent the forged documents to the newspapers. I didn’t destroy the man. You did.”

Harker gapes, finally making a compelling case for having something in common with Mina. He huffs off, because while he has principles, they don’t extend to quitting the cushy job with the awesome housing perks.

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Dracula

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