Episode Report Card
Mr. Stupidhead: B+ | Grade It Now!
Dex And The Maiden
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Previously: Dexter discovered that Harry and Laura Moser knew each other before she got hacked to bits. Mama got Dexter to admit he was in NA. Doakes told LaGuerta that he was "fine" after shooting two guys in six months. Deb wanted to know if Lundy was trying to play dad. Dexter took a road trip with Lila, and decided to not tell Rita. Dexter's marina was put under surveillance because the algae led the cops there. Deb told Dex to consider moving his boat. Dex got to his boat to eliminate any blood trace, but there was a camera already in place.

"There's another shipment coming in tomorrow. Cocaine," says Laura Moser, the camera practically slapping her in the face. Seriously, you can see every downy hair on her upper lip. Harry wants to know how much, and she tells him it'll be around "three-hundred bricks, give or take." "Can you get your hands on some?" "No, Harry, that wasn't part of our agreement." Harry tells her he needs hard evidence, "otherwise, it's just your word against Estrada's." She looks worried, but Harry assures her that he'll protect her, which we all know he totally didn't. "You better," she says, and then, grabbing his hand, wonders if Harry wants to meet her later, presumably for boning. "Laura, the tape's still rolling." Not wanting to get caught, she leans in and whispers something unintelligible into Harry's ear, as we come out of Dexter's mind into his lab, where he's listening to the thirty-year-old tape. "What was that?" Dexter whispers as he rewinds the tape. "My mother, confidential informant. And mumbler. Whatever sweet nothings she had to whisper I probably don't want to hear. It seems my foster father and my biological mother were having an affair. It's bad enough I can't shake the visual, but the questions -- Did he blame himself for her death? Is that why he took me in? Did he love her? Or was he just using her? Was he using me? I always thought Harry's code was on-the-spot creative problem-solving, but maybe he planned for me to settle the score all along. It's times like this I wish I really were a drug-addict." Damn, dude. That's some pretty heavy ish, bro. Huh? What did I just say? No, that was you.

At Lila's house, Dexter is going off, spouting a thousand words a minute about his insecurities and Harry's rules. "I spent so much time trying to live up to his expectations because I thought he had my best interests in mind, but now --" "If you're gonna come over this late, the least you could do is bring me a coffee," says Lila, obviously disinterested in Dexter's tale of woe. Dex apologizes, and Lila heads over to the kitchen to fix herself some. "Truth is, Dex, is doesn't really matter why Harry did what he did. The result's the same. You have an addiction." "Do you think Harry made me what I am?" Lila explains that plenty of people go through shit in their lives that don't make them addicts. "Whatever Harry taught you led you down the wrong path." Dexter explains that he built everything in his life on what Harry told him: "My job, my girlfriend. It's all what Harry told me I needed." Lila asks Dexter what he thinks he needs. "I have no idea," he responds honestly. "Whatever's inside you is spattered all over that paper I took from your lab," she says, motioning to the now-framed blood spatter test paper. I totally want one of those. "Looks messy," says Dex. "Probably is. Look, Dexter. Everyone has a moment when they realize their value system is different from their parents'. Mine was in college, but maybe you're a late bloomer." "Lucky me," says Dex sarcastically, but Lila tells him that he is lucky, because now he can make some of his own decisions, and figure out exactly who he is for himself. He looks frightened and vulnerable, and the way he's lit makes him look like a little boy.

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