Dancing With The Stars

Episode Report Card
Kim: B | Grade It Now!
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DeLay of Game

The third couple is Mark Dacascos (who you may know from Iron Chef America or his martial arts films) and Lacey. Mark seems to have some natural hip action and he's extremely flexible. It must be nice for Lacey after having the injury-prone goofball Steve-O last season.

They are doing the cha cha cha to, I shit you not, "Kung Fu Fighting." I really hate how literal this show is sometimes. COME ON. Mark has great hip action, but he's a little out-of-control at times, and he needs to work on being up on his toes more and less flat-footed. But he definitely brings a lot of energy to the floor, and Lacey did a good job choreographing to his strengths, e.g. lots of kicks.

Judges? Carrie Ann like the potential in his agility and flexibility but he needs to work on his arms. Len doesn't like gimmicks and he wants to make sure that they don't put martial arts in every dance, but he liked the hip action. Bruno thinks they sometimes went for tricks at the expense of the dancing. In his backstage interview, Mark reveals that Lacey is encouraging him to show his man-boobs. Ew. Scores: Carrie Ann 7, Len 7, and Bruno 7, for a total of 21.

Back in the second season, we had George Hamilton; this season, we have his son Ashley, who is partnered with Edyta. Ashley claims that he's an actor and a comedian. Really? Is he out there working the clubs? Ashley and Aaron need to go on the same weight gain 3000 diet. Ashley tells Edyta that he was in a horrible motorcycle accident that put him a wheelchair for a year, and he still has weakness on his left side. He doesn't want to use it as an excuse, but it explains why he has trouble at times.

So how's their foxtrot? He does well when they're in hold, but once they go out of hold, his footwork is atrocious. He's really pigeon-toed and flat-footed. He needs to stick his chest out more, also. Edyta does her level best to distract by appearing nearly naked, but it's not good.

Judges? Len says that the first week is the hardest because you just want to get through the routine, and while his footwork was mostly correct, he needs to work on his finesse. Bruno says that there was a "total lack of showmanship" and Ashley needs to sell it more. Carrie Ann thinks they look stunning, but they need to make themselves stand out more. Scores: Carrie Ann 5, Len 6, and Bruno 4 for a total of 15. Ouch.

Hey, it's Donny Osmond. I feel like he's already been on this show. He's partnered with Kym. Donny gets all embarrassed when he has to touch parts of Kym's bodies that are usually covered by special Mormon underwear. He giggles like a little kid. But he vows to finish higher than Marie, who finished third in her season. Yeah, well she should have been out about three weeks before she was.

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Dancing With The Stars

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