Dancing With The Stars
Season 13 Performance 4

Episode Report Card
Kim: B+ | Grade It Now!
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Celluloid Dreams

So how does the actual dancing go? Chaz comes out wearing boxing gloves and a red silk short robe. And then they kind of dance? It's not much of a paso. You know, I just realized something. Chaz and Carson (and maybe David) are almost on a different show than the rest of the stars. They're on the first season of this show, where the caliber of dancing wasn't that great, but you got involved with the personal stories and rooted for underdogs to succeed. And then somewhere about when Derek showed up, the stars started getting better, to the point where it was sometimes difficult to tell that they weren't actually pros. And honestly, that show isn't as fun to watch. It's not as fun to see a Kristi Yamaguchi or a Jennifer Grey or a Nicole Scherzinger win this show, because it felt like it came easy to them. It's much more fun to see a Carson or a Chaz go out there and pour his heart and soul into a routine, and give some effort towards technique, but it's really about the effort and the attitude. That all said, that routine was awful.

Judges? Bruno likes that Chaz keeps coming back and fighting and getting stronger. Carrie Ann is crying, because she just roots for Chaz and his courage. Len acknowledges that it wasn't great, but it was Chaz's best performance to date, which is a backhanded compliment if I've ever heard one. Hey, Cher's in the audience. I am also impressed that Chaz is running up the stairs after his knees fell out last week. Or whatever happened. Scores: Carrie Ann 7, Len 7 and Bruno 7. Way overscored. Come on.

JR and Karina have the final spot of the night, and they have the foxtrot. Like everyone else, Karina and JR are having some communication problems. Karina brings a male professional in to show JR how to do it. See? I think everyone should do this. It's tough for a woman to show a man how to stand and move, and vice versa. Anyway, they're dancing to the theme from The Pink Panther. When I was in elementary school, if we were good in music class, the music teacher would play this for us as we lined up to walk out the door, and we would all try to sneak around like the Pink Panther. How hilarious it must have been for her to watch a bunch of second graders creeping around like that.

I have to say, the foxtrot is a pretty boring dance. I mean, it doesn't even come close to the drama of a paso doble or even the lyricism of a waltz. It's almost like the producers don't want these two to do well. But Karina did a great job with the choreography, matching it up with Mancini's fantastic theme. JR does a good job, although his frame could be better at times. It wasn't the knockout punch I was hoping for, but it was good.

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Dancing With The Stars

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