Dancing With The Stars

Episode Report Card
Kim: C | Grade It Now!
Fait Accompli

I Spy with My Little Eye some former contenders in the audience. There's former champs Apolo, Shawn Johnson, Kristi "The Gooch" Yamaguchi, and for some random reason, Louie Vito and Susan Lucci. Tom and Brooke explain how the night will work. They have combined last night's scores with the audience votes already. And then tonight, the finalists will do two more routines and all of the scores will be combined. In the first round, the couples will do their favorite routines and be ranked first, second, and third. The couple in third place at that point will be eliminated, and the final two couples will do one last routine to be scored by the judges. That seems really complicated. I had to rewind that like five times.

Nicole and Derek are up first. In rehearsals, they discuss which of their routines they should redo. They end up picking the Argentine Tango. Hmm. Everyone is doing the Argentine Tango. So did they really make that choice, or was that choice thrust upon them? Does it matter? Why would the show lie about it? Anyway, this is my favorite of their routines. People on the forums complained at the time that they saw too many crotch shots from Nicole, but I think it's because she's wearing black panties so it really sticks out, visually. Nicole doesn't seem as steady as she usually does. She's a bit wobbly in a few parts, but the choreography is still amazing and overall, it's still the best routine they did, I think. Len calls it irresistible and he loves the content Derek put in there. Bruno says, "the magic continues," and then yells a lot. Carrie Ann tells them that they are true artists. Oh, no scores yet because they are being ranked. I forgot about that and I was like, "THEY FORGOT TO ANNOUNCE THE SCORES!" because I'm a little ADD about weecapping this show and I need everything to happen in the proper order. I'm a little German like that.

Evan and Anna are up next and they also go through the charade of choosing their favorite dance. This is all just so they can show us clips from their past dances, isn't it? I have CRACKED THE CODE! It's a little sad how Nicole and Derek were like "We have many awesome dances from which to choose" and Evan and Anna are like, "Well, the judges hated pretty much everything we did except our perfect scoring tango." Anyway, how is it the second time around? Ooh. Evan does a crouch at one point that seriously looks like he's about to drop a deuce on the dance floor. I don't think that was right. I think he was off balance and his feet were further apart than they were supposed to be. This is the dance that ends with that crazy spin that the promo monkeys then used in every single intro package the rest of the season. So it was good, but it suffers a bit coming right after Nicole and Derek, whose choreography was way more complex. Judges? Bruno tells Evan he looked like a ladykiller. Carrie Ann just kind of squeals a bit, and then Len says that the caliber of competition is the highest it's ever been. Len reminds us that Evan is the only male star left, and he was leading and not being led, which is important.

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Dancing With The Stars




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