CSI
Spark Of Life

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The Wages Of Sin...

And then Catherine narrates a flashback: "Neal catches Morgan in bed with his wife. He knows where his best friend keeps his gun --" but before we can get to the money shot (as it were), Gil yanks us back to the present by pointing out, "The glass in his shoe just puts him at the scene. We didn't find any blood on the clothes we recovered from his house." Catherine's all, "Eh. Clothes are easy to dump. The glass was an oversight, he didn't know it was there." Gil's still pushing at her theory, and they discuss the odds that Tara did it. Gil points out that getting evidence from her clothing would be tough, since "the clothes she was wearing went up in flames." Catherine remembers the sweater Sara recovered from Prior Walter's truck and says, "Not everything."

In record time, she's processed the sweater and found a suspicious trace of something, which Hodges then processes. Before you can say "micropipette," Brass has Neal in the interrogation tank and is all, "So! Would you care to explain to me how chlorine from the Stewarts' pool ended up on your wife's sweater? Or should we just go ahead and charge her with the murders now?" Neal's attack lawyer raises his eyebrows in a them's the breaks kind of way while Neal chuffs in dismay. Then he says, "Whatever happened, Tara couldn't have done it on purpose. It must have been some sort of accident." Brass muses, "Tara went to Morgan's house to tell him she was pregnant with his child…" He tapers off as he notices Neal's pole-axed expression and asks with his usual feigned surprise, "She told you the baby was yours?" Neal confirms this. Brass is all, "And you believed her?" "We were trying to have a baby. Why wouldn't I?" Neal replies. Brass shrugs, "Well, sure. You and Morgan were close enough in looks, she probably would've gotten away with it." Neal stammers, "She always said, 'A woman without a child of her own was not a woman.'" Some tautologies are too stupid to even dignify with refutation. This is one of them. Neal admits they had tried IVF a half-dozen times -- Brass already knew this, and adds unhelpfully, "You had bad sperm." You know, having a cop discuss whether your boys can swim has got to rank in the Top 50 Worst Masculine Nightmares of All Time.

Well, then Brass spins a tale about how Tara, giddy from the hormones fueled by her adulterous pregnancy, tried to get Morgan to leave his family for her, and when he refused, she killed them. Under Brassian logic, anyone who's on antidepressants is clearly unbalanced enough to kill. I swear, some people read Prozac Nation and it turns them against selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors and the people who take them. Neal's not even listening; he says mournfully, "I told Tara we could adopt. She wouldn't." Because...why? The proof of womanhood's in the gestating of babies, and not in the raising? I'm trying to be sympathetic to the crispy adulteress, but the more I hear about her, the less I like her. Brass continues to talk about Tara's asinine quest for gender validation via conception caused her to kill, kill, kill, and eventually Neal cracks. Naturally, his lawyer is aghast at this development. Brass, however, is delighted.

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CSI

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