CSI
Random Acts Of Violence

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You're Not My Real Dad, Gil!

Archie, on the other hand, is extremely untroubled. He comes bouncing into the Labitrail holding an evidence box and burbling, "That was a cool-looking office! It was kind of fun being out in the field -- pulling drives, collecting evidence, flashing ID. I think I've got a flair for it." Yes, Archie. You do. Nobody as pretty as you should be locked in the Labitrail all day -- the LVPD would be doing a public service by turning you loose onto the world. Nicky's all, "You bucking for a promotion?" Archie grins and says, "Not bucking. Nudging." He then changes the subject: "You know people put their lives on these hard drives?" "Yeah, that's what I'm counting on," Nicky replies.

Cut to Archie daisy-chaining a dozen drives together by their USB ports -- I hope for his sake that they're equipped with USB 2.0, or it's a very slow process to move data indeed. Nicky, meanwhile, is sitting in front of a 15" Titanium G4 PowerBook, yet clicking his stylus around a non-Mac compatible Windows OS PDA. What he sees -- provocative pictures of Miss Thang, a.k.a. Serena -- prompts him to share with Archie. Archie expresses his appreciation of this deed by grinning widely and saying, "Serena can defrag my hard drive any time." Personally, I would have gone with "she can mount my hard drive any time." Nicky laughs.

And then he gets all serious in the next scene as he hands the pictures over to Serena and asks, "Are these business emails? I'm a little confused." Serena looks through the photos and says hastily, "This is actually harmless fun so..." So now it's time for Vega to jump in: "Court documents -- Garrett Kwan was suing you for sexual harassment." Boy, that must have made for a fun workplace. Serena cops an attitude and asks, "Are you familiar with the term 'spurious'?" As the camera pulls back, revealing Serena's miniskirt and white thigh-high stockings with black borders -- oh so chic back in 1994 -- Vega shoots back, "Are you familiar with the term 'murder suspect'?" Serena looks at Nicky, who stares back impassively. This prompts her to sputter defensively, "I was just trying to let him know that I was available. Low-key, okay?" The mind boggles upon contemplating an aggressive pass from Serena. According to her, Kwan freaked, figured it was entrapment, and so he slapped a preemptive suit on her. "It's called a scare tactic," she informs them. Nicky mildly asks, "Scared to lose your job? Your five-figure bonus?" Vega then pushes it too far with, "Scared enough to kill?" Serena protests, "I was flirting with the guy. I will email you with the number for my lawyer." Then she stomps off, leaving a bemused Nicky sitting there and contemplating the strange ways of these internet people.

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CSI

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