Episode Report Card
DeAnn Welker: B | 1 USERS: A+
Obviously Written By Nerds

Nighttime at the Buy More: Buster's talking into his digital recorder about the Buy More. He says there's no sign of intelligent life so far. Chuck and Jeff are in the screening room and Chuck is nervous about what disc Jeff could possibly be putting in. It's a stalkerrific photo-montage music video of Anna set to Air Supply's "All Out of Love." And somehow Jeff just ruined my high school heartbreak memories by stalking Anna to their soundtrack. Chuck is totally disturbed at what a stalker Jeff is, but all he can muster is, "Wow." Jeff says Anna's his muse. Forgive me if I'm wrong, but I think a muse is supposed to inspire something artistic and creative, not something completely weird and creepy. Jeff ups the weird and creepy ante, though, by telling Chuck to excuse him while he slips into his "drinking pants," which are basically MC Hammer pants. Chuck gives an awesome, high-pitched, "Lookathat!" that expresses all of our "WTF?" reactions perfectly. Chuck talks into his watch to abort the mission, saying he's been compromised. Casey responds that the perimeter's secure, and Chuck's like, "I'm talking about the weirdo inside the Buy More."

Sarah and Ellie are getting their wine and girl talk on at Ellie's apartment. Ellie's worried about Chuck. She thinks he's slipping back into old Chuck mode, which she also refers to as "the Morgan years." She credits Sarah with helping him move a little forward, but is afraid he's reverting. She tells Sarah that Chuck's only 12 credits short of graduating and having a real life. She tells Sarah she knows she sounds like his mother. And I will take this moment to talk about Ellie's hair, because she also looks like Chuck's mother. She has wavy '80s hair for some inexplicable reason. Her hair is usually so pretty, all shiny and straight, which completely works for her. But this new wavy thing is not good. Wavy-haired Ellie tells Sarah that if she can assure her she has no reason to worry, she'll lay off. (For some reason -- probably Ellie's history of never laying off -- I don't believe this will ever happen.)

But Ellie does have reason to worry this night, because Chuck is shotgunning beers in his work place with Jeff. With the Anna/Air Supply video on repeat, apparently, because it's still on and still playing the same song. And Buster's watching, and dictating about all of the rules being broken (my favorite: "lewd use of a musical montage"). Instead of doing what someone in his position should do, which would be to go in there and put an end to it. Buster walks away and Chuck and Jeff keep partying. Chuck ends up telling Jeff that some guy came into the store looking for him, with a picture and everything. Jeff imagines he was one of his fans. Chuck couldn't be any more puzzled. Jeff pulls out a VHS tape that he says he's never shared with anyone. Chuck: "Please don't be a porno. Please don't be a porno." The tape -- which Jeff brought with him even though he's never shared it with anyone? -- is the conference of boobs and congratulations that we saw at the start of the episode. Chuck says he used to kick ass at "Missile Command," too. Jeff says he was the best, though. And Stu backs him up, saying that he gets $100 in quarters and a year's supply of Slim Jims for breaking the world record. And the prize is being presented by none other than Morimoto, CEO and engineer of Atari. Chuck flashes on Morimoto, and then Jeff passes out.

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