Chuck Versus the Goodbye

Episode Report Card
Angel Cohn: B | 11 USERS: A
Buy More Another Day

It's the final episode. People who love that this show is so sweet and nice will delight in the fact that it wraps up with a cloyingly saccharine happily ever after for every single character. Our tolerance for such nicey-nice charm, however, ended long ago -- about the time Chuck proposed to Sarah. So, on with the sap...

Picking up two weeks after "Chuck Versus Sarah," we're on a private plane somewhere over an ocean, and Jacob from Lost (and a former Fulcrum employee) has part of the three-piece key to fixing the Intersect. He's selling it off to Quinn, but Sarah's on board, secretly stashed in the luggage, and tries to sneak up on the duo mid-trade to take him out. But despite the fact that she's heavily armed and has a bomb on her person, she completely fails and ends up unconscious and falling out the door of the airplane that she blew open. Thankfully, she was sporting a parachute and wakes up just in the nick of time. Why didn't Sarah shoot Quinn through the leather seats? That big gun she had certainly looked capable of taking out a target through some obstacles. Or why didn't she roll the bomb under his seat and kill him then? And how has this dopey "mastermind" been able to survive being tossed off a train, dropped out of a hotel window and hung by a noose and withstand the sudden air pressure on the plane without being sucked out the door?

While Sarah's doing all that (or not doing all that), Chuck's moping in bed, until Morgan and Ellie crash his room and decide that after two weeks of pouting, he needs to get off his ass and get Sarah back using his nerdy appeal to win her over. Chuck worries that she won't like him, and he's regressed to old Chuck before he became the Intersect. Morgan buys into the Disney Princess Theory that if Chuck just kisses Sarah she'll regain all of her memories. I see where this is going... and I so don't like it.

Chuck doesn't have to look too far for Sarah; she's at the Buy More because she needs his help to find the Ring agent who has the other key. She ends up reluctantly taking him along to Germany, and gives him a real gun because he claims to be a real spy. Once in Berlin, they end up in a Mexican place that looks remarkably like a place they go in Burbank... that's one way to save on sets, I suppose. Quinn gets jumpy and makes Renny Deutch (the ex-Ring-turned-arms-dealer) go to another local, one that's at a consulate where Chuck and Sarah have to get all dolled up and ballroom dance... just like old times. He moves locales again to the Weinerlicious, and okay, that one brought back some fond memories since Sarah's wearing her old outfit, and it's there that she starts to have some muscle memory recollection of her life. It's "cute" and extremely convenient.

Quinn comes in and grabs the second key before Sarah can shoot him. Because though her muscle memory has returned, her shooting reflexes haven't. I can't remotely understand why he keeps getting away, aside from the fact that it is a convenient plot device. Chuck tries to stop him, but panics with the real gun and ends up shooting the helicopter that Casey's been using to track them for Beckman.

They all end up back at Castle realizing that they need to reteam... with the help of Morgan and Momma Bartowski. Chuck's mom (a.k.a Linda Hamilton) says that someone who Chuck's dad trusted in the CIA has the last key -- and that's Beckman. The General is at the symphony in L.A. with some fancy delegate types, and Quinn has rigged her seat to explode if she moves or when the symphony stops playing, whichever comes first. He grabs the key and runs to the roof, while Jeffster! (who have followed Morgan and Chuck) end up playing "Take on Me" to the crowd in order to give Chuck time to find Quinn and learn how to diffuse the bomb.

Up on the roof, Sarah shoots Quinn (FINALLY!!!!) and they grab the Intersect glasses. Chuck has to choose: put them on and save Beckman and a whole theater full of people (including his friends) by learning how to stop the bomb, or save the glasses so that Ellie can reprogram them to give Sarah her memories back. Naturally, he chooses the latter, flashes one last time and stops the bomb with an assist from Sarah, who helps by remembering a porn virus that they used years ago to stop an explosive. Not because she watched her video diaries or anything, just because it popped into her head. Beckman did a great job of selling terrified and pissed off here -- I think I'll miss her most of all.

At Castle, Charmichael Industries disbands (and it is unclear to me if they ever remove the Intersect from Chuck's brain), Casey takes off before it gets too sappy (I only wish I could go with him), and Sarah wants time to find herself. The Buy More is getting taken over by a Subway, making Big Mike very happy. Jeffster! (who try and tell Mike they saved the day) get signed by a German record exec and have to finally leave the Burbank store's confines. Morgan and Alex move in together. Casey takes off after Gertrude (one relationship I actually enjoy) and Awesome and Ellie pack up for Chicago.

Chuck's back to moping. Morgan tells him to follow his heart to find Sarah. She's at the beach and she asks him to tell him "their" story (cue more flashbacks) and then he tells her Morgan's theory about the magical kiss. And they kiss as we pull away from the couple for good.

Told ya. Super sappy and probably made a lot of shippers very happy, but for those of us who liked this show for the spy stuff and the pop culture references, it was a bit of a letdown in terms of adventure... though at this point, it was about what I expected.

For what we loved (and hated) about the series, read our look back.





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