Episode Report Card
DeAnn Welker: A- | Grade It Now!
Desolation. Frostbite. Must be Russia.
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

We open in Encino, California, 1994, where Linda Hamilton's reading our nerd-in-the-making a story about a Frost Queen and a prince, whom she compares to "my little Chuck." He sadly asks if she's going away again, and she says for a few days, but then right back to him and Ellie. They tell each other how much they love each other, and then Chuck's voice starts: "My mom was a spy." He goes on that he and Ellie always thought she walked away, but it turns out they were wrong. Then we cut to the secret lair he found beneath his dad's house as he says, "I need your help. I need your help to find my mom." It all sounds very serious and official, then Morgan walks out from between some shelves and raves about how cool it is this is under his house, with the lasers! And gadgets! And neatly organized files! Morgan wonders why Casey and Sarah aren't helping, but Chuck says they'd ruin it, and Morgan can't tell anyone, especially Ellie. Morgan exposits that he gets it, since Chuck promised Ellie he was out of the spy game. But Morgan is so in with this rogue spy team, "outside of the government, secret to the spy world, team of two, army of one, highway to the danger zone, live free or die hard." Chuck stops him: "Buddy. This is not the opening of a TV show. This is real life." How meta.

Kicky music starts up as Sarah puts on makeup and Chuck helps her get ready for her next mission, calling her "honey" so we'll remember it's official between them. Morgan secretly waits with packed bags for Sarah to leave. Chuck pretends he's sad she's going on a spy mission without him, and he says he and Morgan will be Go-Kart racing while she's gone, so... "come home soon." They make out until Casey interrupts and says it makes him sick. On the way out the door, Sarah tells Chuck she loves him, and he says the same. She tells him nothing will keep her from coming back, and leaves. Morgan tells him he has their stuff packed: money belts, cloned passports, the essentials. Though he almost forgot sunblock. Then we get an extended homage to I Spy as Chuck and Morgan travel all over the world using credit cards, apparently.

Their trip ends in... Los Angeles, in Chuck's mom's safe house. Morgan would like to point out it would have been more affordable to start here instead of traveling the world, but Chuck says they didn't really know about here. Chuck sees a secret safe on the wall, and gets serious about it, since his dad never made it this far. He uses the code to open the door, but the safe's completely empty. He panics a bit, but Morgan's okay with it, because at least there's a Chinese food menu for Imperial Dragons, so they can get some dumplings. Chuck just glares, but Morgan says they'll start over after some dumplings. By then Chuck's pouting, though, so Morgan sits next to him for the best friend pep talk. Which gives our camera a chance to pan out to the camera watching Chuck, and then to the screen of whoever's watching him, and then to Linda Hamilton, who's the one watching her son try to find her. She sighs, "Oh, Chuck." Opening Cake credits. The only change seems to be the addition of one General Redhead. The whole Buy More crew (Big Mike and Jeffster!) are still on board.

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