Engaged And Confused

Episode Report Card
Demian: C | 1 USERS: C
Engaged And Confused

Manor. Up in the nonexistent attic, Raige is busily abusing the Book of Shadows, flipping past the entries for Kali and the "To Make A Lover's Dream Come True" spell before continuing on as Piper enters from the upper stairs to wonder what gives. "I thought you were going ring shopping with Henry," she exposits. Raige mumbles an excuse about the pressing need for research, given the fact that The Key To The Ultimate Power is making a dippy jackass of herself over at The Hagquarters at this very moment. Piper smells bullshit, and calls Raige on it thusly: "When a girl isn't the least bit giddy about ring shopping, that usually means something's very wrong." And there goes Betty Friedan, spinning in her month-old grave. Shut up, Piper. Piper diagnoses a case of cold feet, because this is a television show, and everyone who's about to get married on a television show is required by law to develop serious doubts about the entire undertaking prior to the wedding. Raige bluffs that she's perfectly fine, but it's not working, partly because Mugs McGowan is twitching her way through this scene like an overcaffeinated epileptic, but mainly because she's sporting a hideous tiered top that looks exactly like Chloe's figure skating costume for Sasha Cohen on Project Runway, only in brown with tiny white polka dots. What? There was nothing else on TV last Saturday, and Bravo was running a marathon. Zip it. "I love [the Doltsicle], too," Piper confesses, "but that doesn't mean I didn't get knots in my stomach the moment I said yes." "Really?" Raige gulps, quickly dropping the insouciant act. "Mmmm-hmmm," Piper assures her, "it's perfectly normal."

"Well," Raige hesitates before plaintively wondering, "is it normal to fight about every little thing?" "Actually, yes," Piper shrugs, and actually, I wouldn't have the faintest idea on the matter, so I'll accept that, but I will note that if every married couple bickered and snarled at each other the way Piper and the Dolt have over the last five years, I'd expect the divorce rate to be a lot higher than it actually is. Piper offers Raige a bit of relationship advice that doesn't amount to much more than an exhortation for Raige and Henry to make every effort to listen to each other, but this scene has unexpectedly taken a turn towards the sort of tender-hearted sisterly bonding that's been sorely missing from this show all season, so I don't mind the banality of the advice at all. After a bit more of this, Piper finally orders Raige to Darling Henry's side with, "You need to get your butt out of here! Go -- the demons will show up eventually. They always do." Piper and Raige exchange a set of fond smiles as Raige heads towards the stairs. "Good luck!" Piper calls after her right before the screen flares white to drop us down into...

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