Carrie Diaries
The Long and Winding Road Not Taken

Episode Report Card
Carla Sparks: B | 1 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
Seventeen Candles
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

At the diner, Mouse, Maggie and Carrie catch us up on what we missed when we fell asleep with our eyes open during last week's Carrie Diaries. Is it consoling or horrifying to know that your brain saw the images of the world's most expected "Rubik's Cube-off" training montage and recorded them while you were unconscious? Maggie cheated on Walt and is still not forgiven. Mouse is no longer number one in the class, that black guy Wes is. Carrie's life is basically perfect because she's with Sebastian, Dorrit hasn't run away this week, she works at Interview magazine and she still weighs under 100 pounds so she can't donate blood. To top it all off, it's Carrie's birthday.

Donna LaDonna is upset and this is just the icing on the birthday cake. She's not mad about Sebastian dating Carrie or Walt -- she's upset about a bag. The purse she wants is all sold out. Donna deploys The Jens to get her the purse; figuring out how is their problem. Another riveting plotline is born.

Mouse is meeting Stacy, a graduate of Harvard and fellow Asian. Mouse shows her around, but Stacy is soon distracted by a trophy in the trophy case of none other than Thomas West, whose name I thought was Wes because in the last episode they kept calling him Wes. Apparently they were saying "West" and his actual name is Thomas, but no one goes by the real or first names at this school.

Then Stacy starts flirting with West, because female Harvard grads have been so busy hitting the books they forgot to notice the important thing: boys! West is charming, Mouse feels inadequate because second place is the first loser, as Abby Lee Miller would say. West invites Stacy (if that is her real name) to Spirit Night. Mouse is now obligated to tag along.

Outside of school, Maggie catches up with Walt, who is willing to talk to her. Walt speaks candidly with her and admits that Maggie probably cheated on him, because she wasn't feeling loved. Wheeee, easiest breakup ever.

Tom and Dorrit discuss Carrie's birthday. Dorrit hates Carrie again, and points out all the ways Carrie has failed as a daughter when Tom mentions he wants to give Carrie a credit card. Yeah, she could open a tab at Limelight. Tom gives Dorrit money to buy Carrie a record and Dorrit sulks about it.

At Interview, everyone is fawning over that same bag Donna wants: a red leather Coach duffel. Larissa grabs it to make sure we see it's the bag Donna wanted, and then we move on with job stuff. Interview is hosting a hot party, the "literary event of the year" and it's on the same night as Carrie's birthday. Larissa asks Carrie to work the door, Carrie says she has plans, and then backs away from it because work is more important than birthdays. Now is as good a time as any to learn that you will still be expected to work on your birthday in the real world.

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Carrie Diaries

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