Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Seeing Red

Episode Report Card
Sep: B | 2 USERS: C
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Seeing Red

Summers home. Dawn and Buffy are discussing her latest adventure while Willow and Tara trip down the stairs hand-in-hand. They're so happy and fun-loving that you'd never, ever guess that Something Terrible was about to happen. Unless you've seen a television show before. And I know I said before that I wasn't going to speak ill of the dead, but mocking the dead's clothes is still fair game, right? Oh, okay. I'll be nice. The witches canoodle and kiss to the "aw"s of Summers Sisters. Ah, UPN. It's so nice to see a network that isn't afraid to touch these tough, socially current, hot-girl-on-girl-action-oriented issues. Buffy plays catch-up with everyone and gives the papers she rescued to the witchlets. Willow suggests calling Xander, but Buffy thinks that he needs some alone time. Dawn suggests that Spike could comb the demon bars; Buffy cuts her off with, "Spike's not part of the team." Dawn gets all pouty: "So. He's. Not. Going to be around anymore?" Get with the program, Shiny McWhiny. He hasn't been around since "Bargaining," practically. "What about Anya?" asks Tara, providing to a quick segue to…

…a curly-haired blonde, martini in front of her, sobbing quietly at the bar. The camera pulls back to reveal Anya "consoling" her next victim. This one's boyfriend slept with her sister. Or, as she puts it, "He cheated on me with my fat, ugly sister." Huh. Maybe he cheated on you for being a miserable little witch who would call your own sister fat and ugly. Anya tries to egg her on to make a wish, but then gets caught in her own little theatre of pain. Wah, wah, wah. I may not like Anya as a character, but her delivery consistently cracks me up. The Wronged Party chimes in with, "Men suck. I wish Carl would…" But Anya is too caught up in her own drama to heed her cue.

Cave. Andrew cowers on the floor in front of a demon that's ready for a little snack. But he's really just a decoy so that Warren and Jonathan can zap it with some sort of demon cattle prod. Andrew takes the shock stick from Warren and zaps the demon a few more times, because he is an impotent little coward who can only face things when they're already incapacitated. Warren stops him with, "We need him fresh!" Andrew declares that he's finished being the bait, and Warren says that if "this works. Next time we'll be the thing everyone's afraid of." "What now?" queries Jonathan. Warren tosses him a knife, saying, "It's your turn, Sparky."

Cut to Spike in his crypt, putting some "medicine" in his daily glass of blood. "Does it help?" asks Dawn from off-screen. She's hanging in the doorway. Dawn expositions that she's on the way to spend the night at Janice's to give Tara and Willow some couple time. "So the birds are flying again?" says Spike. "Ain't love grand?" he continues in his best "I am a serious thea-tuh ack-tor" voice. He meanders over to sit in his chair. Dawn is all, "You're not going to be coming around anymore, are you?" Spike tells her that it's "complicated." Dawn is in pain. Spike's attitude is pretty much, "Go away. I'm sulking about not being able to bang your big sis anymore." Dawn wants to know if Spike loves Buffy. She gleans from his silence that he does, and proceeds to lecture him about the Anya situation, saying, "Then how could you do that to her? I don't know what happened between you two. What you did last night? If you wanted to hurt Buffy, congratulations. It worked." Having fulfilled her role as plot device, Dawn leaves silently.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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