Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Dead Man's Party

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: D+ | 8 USERS: C-
YOU GRADE IT
Dead Crappy Episode

The situation worsens -- Willow tries to start in again, but Buffy begs her to stop. Xander tells Buffy to let her finish. Buffy, in tears: "Do you think you could at least stick to annoying me on your own behalf?" I don't think "annoy" was the verb she was going for, but whatever, Xander: "Fine. You stop acting like an idiot, I'll stop annoying you." Cordy pulls an "uh-oh" face at that and really, he just leapfrogged Willow for the Most Loathsome Character Of The Episode Award. Buffy's had just about enough. In a steely voice she says, "You want to talk acting like an idiot, Night Hawk?" This was the line of Buffy's that I thought I had a real problem with, but upon reflection, I really don't. He was acting like such a prick that he deserved that and worse. Buffy and Xander really look like they're going to come to blows. Oz tries to step in, but Willow thinks they "might as well try some violence." Cue a bunch of zombies to come crashing through the windows. Willow: "I was being sarcastic!" Ha. Ha. Bitch. A zombie snaps Jerk #1's neck. The fact that I thought that was funny proves how much this episode sucks.

Zombies, zombies everywhere. The gang springs into action. Joyce asks, "Are these vampires?" Buffy doesn't think so, but stakes one anyway. He just looks at her like she's an idiot. Heh. A zombie grabs Pat. Suddenly, besides Pat, the only non-Scooby left in the house is Devon. Huh? Buffy, Xander, Joyce, and Willow retreat to Joyce's bedroom. On the way, they find Pat, barely conscious. They bring her along and put her on the bed, but she apparently dies in those three seconds. The other four attempt to keep the door shut; as the mask continues to hum, Pat's eyes fly open.

Oz and Cordy emerge from hiding in a closet, armed with ski poles. They run into Giles. Cordy: "How do we know it's really you and not zombie Giles?" Giles: "Cordelia, do stop being tiresome." Cordy: "That's him." Heh. Oz says the "dead man's party" has moved upstairs. We have episode title! I think Oingo Boingo deserves better. Giles explains that the zombies are after the mask, which contains the power of a demon whose name translates as "Evil Eye," and that if a zombie puts the mask on, he becomes the demon incarnate, which would be "worse than a zombie."

Pat rises as a zombie pushes his way into the room. She throws Joyce aside and puts the mask on. The zombie cowers in fear. Evil Eye Pat turns to Willow. "I live, you die." I almost don't have a problem with that. Buffy rushes her, but she hits Buffy with a flash of light, temporarily blinding her. That's the big deal? So if a zombie bought a coal miner's hat and started flashing the light at people, he'd be the Big Bad? Weak. Pat backhands Buffy and turns to Willow again. She moves to snap Willow's neck, but Buffy grabs her and pulls her out the window. They roll down the eaves and onto the ground. Giles, on the stairs, hears them and turns to go outside, but a zombie grabs him. Quick cuts between the three fights going on: Joyce is whacking a zombie with a baseball bat, Buffy's fighting Pat while trying to keep her eyes shielded, and Giles, holding the zombie off with a ski pole, instructs Oz to tell Buffy that Pat's power is in her eyes. Well, duh. Buffy reaches for the shovel she used to bury the cat, but when she turns, she gets the full force of Pat's eye beams. But Oz distracts Pat long enough for Buffy to recover, and she calls, "Pat!" When Pat turns, Buffy rams the blade of the shovel into her eyes. "Made you look." Hee. Pat disappears in a flash of light, as do the other zombies. Everyone reconvenes in the house, and suddenly it's a total love-in. Sheesh. If I were Buffy, I would have turned the shovel on a couple of them, too.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer

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