Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Cruel Intentions

Episode Report Card
Key Grip: D+ | 1 USERS: F
Cruel Intentions
Sebastian is getting Cecile drunk on his bed and taking pictures of her while she writes a response to Ronald's letter. He tries to get her to strip for the pictures. She's not cool with that. He threatens to call her mom and tell on her unless she kisses him, thus actually BREAKING THE LAW instead of just being a creep like usual. She says okay, and he prepares to kiss her, but not exactly on her face, if you know what I mean, explaining that he didn't say where he was going to kiss her. She is very drunk and also very stupid, and is therefore persuaded by his logic. He drops out of the frame and -- oh, you know. Mom pulls back Cecile's covers and can apparently tell the difference between her daughter and a doll, which you mightn't think from the way she tries to control her daughter's life. Cecile comes home. Her mom is less mad than you might think. Cecile and Reese and Sebastian are at lunch together outside Plot Contrivance Manor. Sebastian makes lewd faces and gestures at Cecile to get her to leave the table. Aunt Plot Contrivance approaches and has somehow arranged for Reese and Sebastian to volunteer for the afternoon at a retirement home. Wiggedy-whatever. Sebastian takes advantage of hearing impairment and senility to convince an old woman that he was nice to her, so that she'll talk him up to Reese. Man, this guy will do anything for sex. He should be in therapy. In the nice car, Reese is still not buying what Sebastian's selling, even with the helping-the-elderly thing. But she makes funny faces at him, which I guess means he's going to fall in love with her. I'd like to mock this device, but when she makes devil horns with her fingers and sticks out her tongue, I do believe I've fallen in love with her myself. Get out of the car, Ryan. Let a real man drive. Fluffy comes to see Cecile, who is shell-shocked from her experience with Sebastian. She's reluctant to explain what happened at first, and then whispers into Buffy's Evil Ear, and with the volume way up I can make out something like "saying the alphabet -- with his tongue." I guess Sebastian is a cunning linguist, as it were. Cecile says she didn't like it, then admits she did, and describes her orgasm. Raunchy Buffy tells Cecile that now she might as well sleep around a lot, so that she'll be able to please Ronald the Cello Teacher. It takes all of two seconds to convince Cecile that this is a great idea. Cecile is on Sebastian's bed with him. She's all post-coital, and he's languidly writing in his journal, presumably recording this escapade while she's lying there. Classy. She flirts a little, and he is therefore left with no choice but to throw her violently off the bed. He's, like, so charming -- although, actually, she is pretty annoying in this scene, and I'd probably throw her off my bed, too. But I'd probably also not sleep with the obnoxious moron in the first place, making it a moot point.

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Buffy the Vampire Slayer




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