Breaking Pointe
This Ballet Is Cursed

Episode Report Card
Sara Brady: B | 18 USERS: A-
YOU GRADE IT
Klingons and Dance Belts and Monsters, Oh My

Rex reflects on Emily's fall, saying it reminded him of his injury and now it's undermined his confidence. See, I'd think those impossibly tight white pants—or maybe the terrible little rattail attached to his hair—would do most of the undermining, but I don't know Rex's life, really. You gotta dance with fear and arrogance, buddy.

Christiana frets in a talking head about how Emily's fall has thrown everyone. They miss a lift, further rattling them. Rehearsal ends and Adam hates everything. He says there's just one day to go before opening night (for cast B, in which Christiana is Cinderella), which I didn't realize. His worry is totally understandable in that case. Adam has eight billion notes for the dancers. Rex and Christiana try and fix their lift problem and Adam gives them some tips.

Ian's girlfriend, Allyson, is watching from the audience as Ian tries to figure out how to lift his partner without using one hand. He's in a lot of pain and almost drops her. Christiana says in a talking head that it's really sad that Ian's being taken out of the show due to his injury, but she vocal-fries the words "really sad" so much that it seems like she's saying, "Ian and Allyson went to the Galleria? And then Tai met some randos who almost dropped her off the second floor? It was way harsh." Allyson comforts her loyal tin soldier, and her hair looks very excellent. Very supportive hair, Allyson.

Beckanne stretches in her pajamas and shows her various wee tattoos to the camera. In all of her talking heads she's wearing this terrible blue crushed-velvet shirt that belongs to a time period older than she is. I find this shirt baffling. Not baffling: Josh getting out of the shower. Hi Josh! Rex drinks his coffee and stretches his arch and worries about opening night.

Ronnie's house! Ronnie has no opening-night jitters. He also has no problem being on camera in his undercrackers. He's still sad not to be part of Cinderella, as this is the first time in his career he's been completely sidelined. Ronnie, I think crunches will make you feel better. And that's an episode wrap for Ronnie!

The dancers get their faces and costumes on. Zach, in just his wig and makeup, without his costume, looks disturbingly like Linda Ronstadt in the seventies. Josh might actually be in costume as a formal-dress Klingon. Ian is sadly not in costume, as Chris is not (he's one of the stepsisters in cast A). Allison calls her mom as she does her makeup and asks if Dread Boyfriend has talked to her. (Remember that Allison's family loves Dread Boyfriend.) She asks if her mom knows if Dread Boyfriend is planning to surprise her and come to the show, but Allison's mom said he just called to ask about Allison's grandma, who's been ill. Allison looks like she's considering impaling herself with an eyeliner.

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Breaking Pointe

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