Boardwalk Empire

Episode Report Card
Joe R: B+ | Grade It Now!
Family Limitation
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

It's a beautiful, sunny day on the boardwalk in Atlantic City. Lovers ride on horseback down the beach, children frolic and such, and an old, pudgy bureaucrat is making the last of his bribe-collecting runs around the local businesses. As he crosses the latest shop off his list, a kid runs up to him and, unprovoked starts giving him shit, then spits in his face. Pudgy gives chase, yelling at the "guinea bastard," despite the kid not seeming all that stereotypically Italian. He's almost caught up with him when he rounds a corner (things go all slo-mo, because whoever directed this episode felt like impressing Uncle Marty), only to be met with an adult-sized thug, this one with a sock full of quarters or whatever kind of blunt-force whacking tool was of the style at the time. He clocks Pudgy but good, then clears out his collection envelope. Hey! This is awfully similar to the plan Mickey Doyle was talking about two weeks ago. Hmm...

Nucky and Lucy are in bed, naked if you can believe that. She's being her usual, charming self: aggressively naked and calling him "daddy" in that baby voice that every straight man must be dying to hear from their girlfriend. Who doesn't want to be made to feel like a pervy old pedophile first thing in the morning? If I have one major criticism of this show so far, it's that some of the characters show very few shades of gray. This is remedied somewhat this week in folks like Capone and Dana Ivey -- and obviously the major characters, Nucky, Jimmy, and Margaret, are all sufficiently complicated -- but folks like Eli, and Van Alden, and especially Lucy are just so predictable in their awfulness. Lucy being the worst offender. Yes, we're supposed to be rooting for Nucky and Margaret, but I think we would be anyway even if Lucy weren't the off-putting, baby-talking Jennifer Tilly of this show. Alas. This time, she starts talking about being Nucky's "little tiger cub," and as she slinks her (franky marvelous and unbelievable) naked form atop his, she suddenly scratches the shit out of his chest. Like, he's bleeding. He has wounds. This is what happens when you let half-retarded, over-developed woman-children into your bed. He yells at her and she pouts. We've seen this scene before, albeit with less blood.

Speaking of Ms. Dana Ivey -- whose character finally gets a name this week, sort of. It's Mrs. McGarry, and she's at her office when Margaret comes calling. She wants to "speak about a private matter." A man has made an offer to her. Mrs. McGarry inquires as to whether the nature of this offer is financial? Domestic? Sexual? Um ... yes? When she asks who with, Margaret replies, "He runs things." Ahh, say no more. McGarry asks if he's going to marry her. That'd be a big NOPE. McGarry: "There are various words for that sort of woman. None of them are flattering." The words could not be more harsh, and after the display of judgy eyes McGarry shot at Margaret all through last week, you might expect her tone to be, but it's actually not.

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Boardwalk Empire




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